Hi ladies!

[sugarplum]

Hi, I joined recently and thought I'd better start posting - this seems like such a supportive group of women.

I have 2 beautiful, delightful sons and am pregnant with my 3rd boy, and have been struggling to come to terms with it because I ALWAYS thought this one would be a girl. I LOVE boys but also long for a little girl in our beautiful family. I am now 39 and don't want any more kids but feel like my husband is torturing me as he is all of a sudden very keen to have 4 kids (which is a new thing - he always said he wanted 3!). And the thought that we could have a daughter is messing with my rational brain that says - 3 is enough!

I am basically wanting to offer support to others, and investigate success rates of IVF PGD. I believe it is rarely successful for someone over 40, and I don't want to invest a whole lot of time, emotions and money for something that is just a pipe dream. I just want to lay this 4th baby idea to rest, if you know what I mean? I need to have some closure and either know for sure this is my last baby, or start planning for the alternative if I change my mind. The ghost of my 'maybe-daughter' is kind of haunting me at the moment.

Hope this all doesn't sound too crazy! Glad there is a place where I can at least voice it.

[nuthinbutpink]

Hi there and welcome!

You have a lot on your mind right now! I have been on the forums for several years and I have seen IVF work for women around the age of 40. It can work.

BUT, you need to be prepared to try more than once. IVF for gender selection reduces your chances in some situations because you eliminate half of the embryos that may make a baby due to gender. There is some luck involved to have the gender split go your way with IVF and that changes our odds dramatically.

You could go through a cycle 6-7 months after the birth of your son and freeze the embryos. You could then go back for any embryos when you are ready for a transfer. That way, the eggs are as young as they can possibly be whereas if you wait until you are "ready" to have another baby, the eggs will be that much older.

If you have the funds to try, you can plan for a couple of cycles and see what happens.

[sugarplum]

Gosh, thank you so much for your reply! Already that clears some of the confusion for me.
Freezing embryos is such a smart idea I never would have thought of that myself! I am very new to this - can I ask, do you mean I would do a cycle, freezing ALL embryos, then do PGD just before implanting when I'm ready?

[The Anchor]

Welcome and GL!

[ThePack]

Welcome. I know the feeling you're describing well.

I love my family just as it is, but I never felt done either. I'd love to have a son. I've spent a lot of time researching various adoption options, etc. and keep coming back to IVF with PGD.

So after 3 years of having very strong feelings about it, we've started the process.

Good luck on your journey!