To circumsize or not to circumsize????

[DoulaMama]

I think it should be mandatory for parents to be in the room while their son is circed. If a person wants their son to undergo a cosmetic surgery without his consent, the least you can do is be there to talk to him and comfort him. He's just spent 9 months being protected in the womb and then he gets taken away from mommy, strapped down, injected with pain meds, and has a piece(a very important piece I might add) of his body removed. I'm so glad that I have an intact body...imagine if it were the other way around and we were taking girl's breast buds off in their teens for cancer prevention or removing the hood of our girls clitoris'. I would ultimately want to have the final say because no matter if I'm 9 days or 90, it's my body, my choice. JMNSHO.

[Roonarpia]

I totally see what you are saying doulamama. That is what is hard for me, I can't imagine doing something to my girl's bodies after birth so why cut foreskin off of your son's penis? Just hard to swallow. Surprisingly though I am still having a hard time making a decision.

[nuthinbutpink]

Doula, I hear you and I do understand that it is a cosmetic thing. I chose to leave the issue up to my husband. He is a man, grew up with boys, men and for me, it was his issue to decide. He knows what it is like (where we live) for kids that were not cir'd and what it meant growing up and as an adult. So, as superficial as it sounds(and it is not a lack of education- we both have higher degrees, LOL) we chose to have him go through the procedure.

I make decisions everyday for my children. Right or wrong, I take everything under consideration and I do make them. Of course I would never want to cause my child pain or do something that cannot be taken back, but it is not something that can be done as an adult(I know it CAN be but let's be real- no grown man would want to do that as an adult) so for cultural reasons, we did it. It doesn't seem to bother my DH and I have never heard a story from someone I know persoanly that has struggled due to his circumcision.

[ThinkPink]

I completely agree with doula! Thankfully, this is isn’t even an issue in the UK as it is only carried out for medical/religious reasons! I can’t believe that newborn babies are routinely put through a procedure which carries its own risks for purely cosmetic reasons (the proposed health benefits have been completely discredited)! As already pointed out above, circumcistion was originally performed as a punishment for little boys found masturbating. I just dont see how it has a place in modern medicine! The human body is the result of millions of years of evolution, the foreskin has purpose! Your baby is perfect!

Doing it so that sons look like their fathers is in my opinion ludicrous! My dh was circ'd for medical reasons we will simply explain to DS why they are different.
JMHO

[Roonarpia]

Well I am 90% sure we are not going to circumcise. There is just no reason to, I just hope it is not something our son wishes we had done.

[purplepoet20]

Well I am 90% sure we are not going to circumcise. There is just no reason to, I just hope it is not something our son wishes we had done.

There are plenty of websites that help parents explain to there kids about why they are different... and even groups for parents of intacted boyss.

[Roonarpia]

There are plenty of websites that help parents explain to there kids about why they are different... and even groups for parents of intacted boyss.

Wonderful to know, you are so awesome purple thank you!

[DoulaMama]

Well I am 90% sure we are not going to circumcise. There is just no reason to, I just hope it is not something our son wishes we had done.

I have 10+ men in my family(all from the UK) and after talking to each and every one of them about being intact.....(yes, slightly embarrassing but I needed to talk to intact men...not circed ones) I felt very comfortable about my kids future as an intact man. Not one of them had any issues at all...EVER. They were all shocked that I was even considering it!
Anyway, rule number 1: make sure you never retract your son's foreskin. Make sure every person that will ever change his bum knows not to retract- this includes your Dr too.
2. Wipe it like a finger
3. Do not freak out if your kid is not retractable at 2-most kids will be able to by 14 years of age.
4. Find an intact friendly Dr if your child does have any issues. The foreskin is important and just chopping it off at the first sign of a problem is not the way to go. In the UK for every 1000 men that are intact, only 10 will medically need a circ and that stat is because the Dr's know it's an important part of a man's sexual health

The reason why some intact men have issues later in life is BECAUSE someone retracted them before they were ready. The foreskin is attached to the glans(which when circing is kinda like removing a fingernail from the nail bed...ouch). Early retraction causes scarring and adhesions issues later in life.

You don't have to worry about cleaning inside until the boy can actually retract himself(with my boys it started around 2-3 years) and even then they(the child) just gently pull back and swish with water. No harsh soap needed...it's like our vaginal tissue on the glans(head) and when it's protected it "self cleans" itself. Also, I let my babies have access to themselves on a regular basis as this is what helps loosen the attachment to the glans and helps with retraction later on. If I were to have any issues with my intact sons later in life I will make sure that the urologist I see will be pro-intact. I suggest finding an intact friendly Dr as well......as my family Dr tried to retract my 12mos old son! I was shocked! Most Dr's will have zero clue about leaving it alone so you must speak up for your child

I would say your son will most likely thank you for leaving his body the way nature intended

[Queen-o-Queens]

Roonarpia I am in the same boat... this is the first time it's been an issue, DH is set on having it done, but I just don't want him to have to go through the pain! Depending on the doctor you might not have to be in the room, my friend thought she was going to have to be in the room, but they took him back and brought him back a few minutes later

[Roonarpia]

Roonarpia I am in the same boat... this is the first time it's been an issue, DH is set on having it done, but I just don't want him to have to go through the pain! Depending on the doctor you might not have to be in the room, my friend thought she was going to have to be in the room, but they took him back and brought him back a few minutes later

What do you think you will end up doing Queen?