Why do you want a girl?

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Cherry bomb

I really just want to stop feeling like I'm missing out on something. It's like an exclusive club that I can't get into. Everyone else I know is a member of the club and they rub it in that I'm not allowed. I want to be able to make sure other all boy moms know that their not " missing out". I want to be able to say " I have both and the stereo types are wrong." Boys are wonderful and my daughter doesn't give me anything my boys didnt . Even if its a lie.

---

This is exactly me! I could have wrote everything word for word!!!!!! I'm realistic to know that just because you have a daughter doesn't mean you will have that special relationship. She could be the complete opposite of you, or just care more about friends/husband than her mom. I'd obviously love to have a daughter who'd want to spend time with me when she's older. Who I could take on shopping trips while my husband takes our two boys somewhere else. That'd be great and I'd love love to have that. But, It's no guarantee. I know so many people that aren't close with their moms at all... and for no reason except they are too different, or just too into themselves. For me, it's just like Cherry Bomb said - I hate how people make it seem like your missing out on something! To most people, the idea of not having both genders doesn't even cross their mind, so having a certain gender doesn't affect their life nearly as much as it might to some of us (knowing how we felt before). I hate the constant comments, and the pity that I think people feel for me. I know if I have a girl I'll be happy for a bit, but then life will go on.. new problems will come and it'll be just like everything else! It just drives me nuts that it's the one thing you have zero control over and yet everyone makes it seem like it's so easy to acquire! "You really need a daughter, they are the best" "You need to have another so you can get your girl" If only it was that easy!

Really can relate and share many of the same feelings about wanting a daughter. Came from a family of 3 girls and we have a great relationship as well as with my mom. I want the experience of raising a daughter too and someone to impart my mothering wisdom of being a woman. I've always thought I'd have a girl too. I also want a daughter for my husband and a sister for my two boys. Just so many, many reasons! (Also, love beadinmom's comment about having made amazing boys already, LOL!)

I would just really love the experience of raising both genders. If I had two girls I would be swaying boy right now. The adorable clothes and girly things are just an added bonus :)

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by gurly

Are you doing fertility treatments? I wish you the best !

---

No, we did while TTC #1. We did over a year (not quite 2) of treatments including 6 months of Clomid plus IUIs with Follistim. Nothing worked. So DH has said he doesn't want to go through all that again when a) they could not find anything wrong with us and b) none of it worked. We eventually got pregnant on our own and had DD, so I'm kind of hoping/praying it can happen again, but as I'm almost a decade older than when we STARTED trying, I'm not super hopeful at this point.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Hopeful1

No, we did while TTC #1. We did over a year (not quite 2) of treatments including 6 months of Clomid plus IUIs with Follistim. Nothing worked. So DH has said he doesn't want to go through all that again when a) they could not find anything wrong with us and b) none of it worked. We eventually got pregnant on our own and had DD, so I'm kind of hoping/praying it can happen again, but as I'm almost a decade older than when we STARTED trying, I'm not super hopeful at this point.

---

Sounds like you need to move on to IVF. Would you consider HT?

I want my DH to have the daughter he has always wanted.

I want to be able to tell everyone that boys are just as good as girls in my personal experience

and the shopping would be fun even though I'm not a big pink fan

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by BeadinMom

And for the record, I don't believe a daughters your daughter thing....
I think it's how you raise your boys...
I've already told my kids, they can only marry a girl who is nice to & loves their mom.
And we don't just say it, we live it
I adore my mom-in-law...she's with us on every family vacation & I wouldn't have it any other way!!! :)

---

:agree: my mother in law is my best friend. And my adult sons and I still hang out a lot even now that they're 21 and 18 - they are really the greatest. In most of the world thoughout history, it was totally the opposite, the girl went and moved in with the man's family and was closer to them, and it's still that way in most of Asia and Africa.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by vickyaust

Sounds like you need to move on to IVF. Would you consider HT?

---

No IVF for us. A) we can't afford it and B) DH has said he is happy enough with DD and doesn't want to mortgage her future for a possible sibling by going into debt for infertility treatments. So I am doing what I can to get pregnant and keeping my fingers crossed that something works. Atomic gave me a great idea in another post, so I'm going to try that next cycle.

I want a girl for the simple fact that I was close with my mom and love dresses. I see absolutely everyone with atleast one girl and love it better. always loved their boys til they experienced a girl and had cute clothes, did hair, and nails. i want one even more desperately since my hubby has one and we have a son together, like i failed at getting a girl out of him when his ex wife already did and shes prego again with another girl by her new guy and gives me an attitude like i can lay down and get a girl no problem just cz she knows how desperate i am. she even called to tell my hubby their daughters getting a sister, yeah i cried for months ;(

I wanted a girl because I had a awful relationship with my mentally ill mom (and we no longer speak) - after I had her, I realized how left out she was and remember spending the first half of childhood wishing for a sister...I have wanted the same for my DD ever since. I've given her 5 more brothers and my guilt has only increased with each one. In hindsight it would've been easier on her to stop at 3, but here we are now :)