Atomic frequency and abstaining ttc boy

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Originally Posted by Throwaway_panther

So what makes every 4 days both girl and boy suggestions? Is it the extra attempts at O then that edge more boy?

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Every 4 days for pink swayers ends up being basically one viable attempt in the fertile window without them having to track or monitor anything.

Every 4 days for blue swayers is in addition to 3 attempts in fertile window. This is for (as I just explained right above this) regular exposure to your husband's semen and also for benefits for him by improving sperm count and quality. And then in addition to that you have the 3 attempts. (and I didn't go into this above but some guys who do have trouble completing the transaction if they tried to do it 3 times in a row, could actually sneak in another viable attempt this way for example if it fell on O-2, and then he could not DTD the next day or the next morning - it's like a back up plan too for guys who cannot always perform under pressure or many times in a row.)

Remember, these patters are just tools to accomplish things we are actually trying to achieve here. The important thing seems to be one attempt for pink, and more sperm on hand both coming out of DH, and also on hand to meet egg for blue. Both can be accomplished with e4d in different scenarios.

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Originally Posted by squigglepink

My 1st son we BD on CD10, CD12, CD16 and CD25 ( i was not using opk's). My 2nd son we BD on CD7, CD10, CD12, CD14, CD18 and CD 25 (Again, No opk's used)

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:agree: exactly. What the majority of blue mamas do (some of us have 2-3-4 boys or more this this way) is just regular BD, not daily, but every couple days. Sometimes thru O, sometimes even with a cutoff, but just in with regular BD not really knowing that it swayed in any particular way.

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Originally Posted by rachel86

Thank you bre_cooper11 and Pearl327.
So I should baby dance every other day, that should fall around 0-3 or 0-2 etc and then DTD 3 times within 24 hrs, as soon as I get the first positive opk. Is there a reason why atomic doesn't recommend continuing to baby dance after the 24 hrs (on ovulation day) ? Does it sway pink?
Based on my baby dance pattern every other day, would it be okay if I end up DTD on 0-2 and then again the next day on O-1 and again on O day? That wouldn't leave room for 2 days abstain? I wouldn't be able to know when I get my first positive opk only until I'm at O-1

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The abstain doesn't matter any more once the fertile window opens. Once you become fertile, you start making copious EWCM and the sperm go up there and hide out till the egg shows up. So, you don't have to abstain any more at that point.

Example - a person trying for one Shettles attempt might have their hubs abstain for like 4 days and then hit it with one big attempt on O Day. There might be 40 million sperm in that shot (most of which would never even have time to capacitate and make it to the egg, ladies, so please don't do classic Shettles for a boy!!)

But a person trying for regular BD + 3 would have, to use your example, a 40 mil. shot on O-2 (one of your two most fertile days, by far better than O Day!) then another shot of O-1 (your other most fertile day) and even if it was half what the first shot was, you'd still have added another 20 mil. Again the next morning (we'll half it again) and that is 10 mil. more sperm, and again the following night for 5 more. All those sperm have at least a shot at the egg and if there is some kind of communication between sperm or other effect from the number of attempts, you're going to end up way better off than you were with one shot on O DAy.

I actually DO recommend BD after 24 hours. Some people may not want to because they're scared of hitting O+12. But if you think you're still fertile, I'd keep right on chugging with attempts and even after you think your window is closed, resume the every 2-4 days pattern in case you haven't Oed yet and also to continue the exposure to the semen and reap the benefits of that.

great thread ladies, thanks for questions!!!

Thank you so much atomic! So when you say to continue baby dancing even after the 3 attempts at 24 hours, do you mean resume baby dance 2-4 days from then or do you mean (if I can) fit in one more attempt after the 24hrs and then baby dance 2-4 days from then? Do you think it's beneficial for that 4th attempt? I wouldn't want to wear out my DH haha but if it will help us in increasing our chances of getting a boy I know he will agree to it.

Okay, so Atomic, just to make sure I'm understanding, does this sound like a good plan?

About a month before TTC, start cutting back from daily release to every other day. Then when I get a positive OPK, BD that night, twice the next day, and once a day for the next couple days after that. Then go back to every other day-ish. This wouldn't be an issue for DH; he'd go 2-3 times a day if I was game for it.

Anything there I need to change?

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Originally Posted by atomic sagebrush

Now for some of us whose husbands are able to DTD more (and many of our pink swayers are in this boat, we have guys on here who release on their own just for fun every day and then can BD every day besides o.O)

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This is my DH... ._. He has even gone twice DURING sex, or will release himself within a half hour of having sex. Sex might be the only thing we were ever super blue at lol (after reading Shettles, I thought we had a girl because we had too much sex, even though it wasn't every day but super close to your recommendation)

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Originally Posted by atomic sagebrush

Regular exposure to the hormones in your husband's semen may make you both more fertile (pretty well proven) and also more boy friendly (less proven but still a strong theory). Addionally it may make HIM more blue friendly too by possibly upping sperm count and overall fertility (including T levels) versus doing it his-own-self. SO, I prefer you guys to BD when not fertile as well, BUT some people choose not to do that because they're worried about Shettles. It's up to you to decide. If you are a Shettles believer you'd have him release either on his own or with you, with a non-spermicide condom.

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So even though I know Shettles doesn't mean ****, my concern over the unprotected sex for blue is worrying about not getting in the extra attempts at O, and accidentally getting pregnant with the every few days deal :/

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Originally Posted by rachel86

Thank you so much atomic! So when you say to continue baby dancing even after the 3 attempts at 24 hours, do you mean resume baby dance 2-4 days from then or do you mean (if I can) fit in one more attempt after the 24hrs and then baby dance 2-4 days from then? Do you think it's beneficial for that 4th attempt? I wouldn't want to wear out my DH haha but if it will help us in increasing our chances of getting a boy I know he will agree to it.

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Either/or. What we're trying to guard against, is a delayed ovulation that happens later than you think it's going to. So we don't want to rest on our laurels having 3 attempts at positive OPK and then nothing, and then egg shows up 2-3 days later and there just isn't anything THERE to meet it. Since lower sperm numbers may sway pink, this could undermine your sway to some extent and it's certianly not going to help you get pregnant. So if you O 48 hours after that first positive or even more like 72 (this can happen sometimes) and you stop BD on what you think is O day, then that's 2 more days with no attempts for sperm to die off. So if you wanted to tack another attempt on to cover against that, that doesn't hurt anything (because again, you're just adding more sperm to the mix if you haven't Oed yet, OR the egg will be fertilized or dead by then if you have.)

If you're pretty sure you Oed, then going back to the every 2-4 days idea is always a good one because if you do O late, there will be a relatively healthy size batch lying in wait (vs. every single day in a row.) plus it hopefully helps in the future with the regular exposure to the hormones in the semen.

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Originally Posted by gojulieogo

Okay, so Atomic, just to make sure I'm understanding, does this sound like a good plan?

About a month before TTC, start cutting back from daily release to every other day. Then when I get a positive OPK, BD that night, twice the next day, and once a day for the next couple days after that. Then go back to every other day-ish. This wouldn't be an issue for DH; he'd go 2-3 times a day if I was game for it.

Anything there I need to change?

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Yes. This is a solid plan and great for a guy who likes to BD a lot. :agree:

IF anyone out there is reading this and now wanting to adopt a plan like this, PLEASE only do it if your husband is already BD every day all the time and you got girls doing that. If you and your husband are having sex once a month or once a week and/or your husband has trouble getting an erection or ejaculating in a reasonable time. This would NOT be a good plan for 95% of blue swayers and so this is just a special case here and not a blanket prescription.

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Originally Posted by Throwaway_panther

This is my DH... ._. He has even gone twice DURING sex, or will release himself within a half hour of having sex. Sex might be the only thing we were ever super blue at lol (after reading Shettles, I thought we had a girl because we had too much sex, even though it wasn't every day but super close to your recommendation)

So even though I know Shettles doesn't mean ****, my concern over the unprotected sex for blue is worrying about not getting in the extra attempts at O, and accidentally getting pregnant with the every few days deal :/

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:agree: my husband regularly goes 2x. What you guys have to avoid is the supersex where it's all day every day. I have seen it very often that the folks who BD every day all the time do end up having more girls (but again, this is NOT something I recommend for a pink sway tactic because it can backfire in a number of ways that I"ll go into if anyone is interested).

That IS my concern too for blue swayers, that the guys who try for too much sex, end up unable to finish or even start during the fertile window when it really counts. Thus, this is why I recommend the every 2-4 days pattern is because the majority of guys can DTD that often and still hit it with 3 in the fertile window.

Thanks Atomic! It feels good to officially have a plan :)