I'm feeling a bit better. I started a registry online yesterday and went and bought some of it today. Now I have some of the most important things like bottles and socks. DH thinks I'm nuts for buying them now.
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I'm feeling a bit better. I started a registry online yesterday and went and bought some of it today. Now I have some of the most important things like bottles and socks. DH thinks I'm nuts for buying them now.
I don't. I've already bought some stuff and I have longer than you :)Quote:
Originally Posted by BunnyGirl19
🙏 for a healthy 🌈 🚼 We're having a girl! 🎀👗
TwoInTow83 Ovulation charts on FertilityFriend.com
Yeah I've bought a few things too. U/s on Monday, will take the whole family which will be nice. Actually I might leave the little fella.
Two girls and one boy, due October 16
Guys just don't get it. You would think veteran dads like this would know better, but I think a baby just isn't real to them until they're holding it. And they have NO idea how hard it is to shop for stuff like this with a little baby. I keep trying to tell dh that I need to get stuff done now because when baby comes I won't be able to do anything. he just gives me a blank look like I'm nuts. Of course, he's not the one who will have a little person attached to his nipples most of the day either.Quote:
Originally Posted by BunnyGirl19
LOL..it's so true. I'm honestly having some anxiety because between the two I have now (who are simultaneously going through rough stages), working and selling and buying our own house I feel pretty close to edge of insanity and then I imagine a newborn...and no sleep and I just can't cope. LolQuote:
Originally Posted by girliedreamz
I can't imagine. Maybe the novelty of a new baby will help?? Do you think there is any chance of that with your little ones?Quote:
Originally Posted by lala22
I wasn't so lucky last time but we can dream lol. When my youngest was born my oldest was 4 and he knew I couldn't chase him or anything else because I was recovering from surgery AND had a baby permanently attached to my TTs for 6 weeks and he took FULL advantage and was a super-turd the whole time unless daddy was home.
🙏 for a healthy 🌈 🚼 We're having a girl! 🎀👗
TwoInTow83 Ovulation charts on FertilityFriend.com
Oh boy. Well, last time around my daughter was horrendous while I was pregnant but once the baby was actually here she was so sweet with him. So far, again she's being out of control and down right mean at least half of the time. Little guy is still so little..I think he'll be difficult when baby is here because he just won't get it and he is so into me..I'm a bit worried about his jealousy.Quote:
Originally Posted by twointow83
We were REALLY worried about jealousy when my youngest was born too. Your youngest is considerably younger than my oldest was at the time so you might need to come up with some ideas for younger kids but we put a plan in place to make sure my oldest felt included... like it wasn't just about the baby but him too. Here is what WE did (and will be doing again):Quote:
Originally Posted by lala22
Starting right from the start we had a couple presents "from the baby" to my oldest. The idea was that everyone pays soooo much attention to the baby that we wanted him to feel like it was a special day for him too. It was sooooo cute! We got him a Tonka truck and a stuffed animal "from the baby" and he kept the truck and gave my youngest the stuffed animal!! He wanted the baby to have a present too! It was precious!!
We enlisted him as the big helper! He loved the idea of being the bigger, more able brother and he loved the praise he got for helping us. So, if I needed a diaper I would ask him "Would you be Mommy's big helper and get me a diaper for bubby?" and once he did I would say something along the lines of "You are such a big help with bubby! I don't know how I could do it all without you!! Thank you so much!" Then give him a kiss. He didn't always want to help (for example, he absolutely refused to throw a poopy diaper out, lol, wet was ok, but not poopy) and I would just say ok. I didn't want him to feel like he HAD to help, just wanted him to feel like if he wanted to that he could. In all reality I didn't really need the help because I kept everything I needed in reach while I recovered from surgery and, frankly, it took longer to wait for him to help than to do it for myself. BUT the point wasn't that I needed the help. The point was to allow him to feel involved. He LOVED it when I'd let him pick out an outfit for his brother to wear that day too. I think that was his fav big brother thing to do. Since I would put outfits together before I hung them up I didn't have to worry about mismatch either. He just went, grabbed a hanger (with a complete outfit) and he acted like he felt like the biggest thing since sliced bread because HE got to pick out the outfit.
When we were out and ran into ppl we knew we let him introduce the baby to ppl who hadn't met the baby yet.
We took LOTS of pics of him being sweet to his brother, holding him, etc. and told him it was so we could brag to everyone about what a great big brother he was.
For your 16 month old, the big helper thing might work on a smaller scale (like making him the special diaper helper... or some other name he'll get into based on his interests... diaper hero maybe?)
Maybe you could watch his fav cartoon with him while you feed the baby so he still feels like that is his special time?
The key is to make him feel happy about his new role without him feeling robbed of time with you. It can be tricky but you know him pretty well so you could probably come up with a few things. If he is an attention hog, use it to your advantage! Have anyone that comes over tell him what a great big brother he is and really lay it on thick (and your DD is a great big sis too, can't forget about her). If he eats it up when you praise him, provide opportunities for him to get the praise and then really dole it out... like way over the top praise. You can figure this out :) Troll the net to get ideas if you want to! The hardest with a newborn, but probably the best thing you can try to do is try to set aside time each day when Daddy is home, or when baby is sleeping, for each of your kids where it's time with JUST you, one-on-one with them. Time they can look forward to that is just for them and not the baby or anyone else. It truly is the hardest thing you can do when you are sleep deprived and dealing with an unpredictable newborn but I think it goes the farthest in making sure the older ones don't feel like they have been replaced, or that you think the baby is most important (not saying that you'd ever do anything to make them feel that way but kids can be jealous and resentful if they feel like they are not getting the time that they used to before baby came and time is a precious commodity with a newborn).
You are so positive and helpful- you must be an amazing mother. Thank you SO much for the tips..I'm definitely going to be on the hunt for some ideas to make everyone feel included.Quote:
Originally Posted by twointow83
Lol, well thank you for the kind words but really I am just a worry-wort planner lol. My mind trends toward worst-case scenarios and I just plan accordingly. Not all my plans pan out (like the alone time thing didn't work because DS2 was practically glued to my breasts and if I dared try to do something else... even just pee, He would scream until I got him relatched) but hoping it will this time esp since DS2 is far more attention hungry than DS1 was. You are doing great too! You see the potential for an issue and want to nip it in the bud BEFORE it becomes an actual problem.... that's really the best we can do as parents. We just do the best we can with the info we have.
🙏 for a healthy 🌈 🚼 We're having a girl! 🎀👗
TwoInTow83 Ovulation charts on FertilityFriend.com
I told DH I hoped baby A flipped head down soon and stayed that way so I could have the option of a vaginal delivery. He told me he wants me to have a c-section instead. I a section with DD and aside from the five days I spent in the hospital I had no time to take it easy and recover. I was discharged in the late afternoon and the next morning I was completely on my own with two toddlers plus whatever my mom needed help with (her husband had passed away a couple weeks prior plus she was getting ready to have quadruple bypass surgery). I was in so much pain trying to do what needed to be done and I healed very slowly because of lack of rest. I fully expect it to be the same this time as well, except I have four kids 5 and under at home already and won't have more than minimal help, if any. DH thinks I'm overreacting. And then he goes and schedules a 4-day business trip when I'm 33 weeks pregnant, which means I'm pretty much screwed if I go into labor then. Unless I can get MIL to come watch my kids I have no one, and even then I can't count on her to show up quickly if she did come and I had a really short labor, just over 3 hours, with my last pregnancy.
Two, I think my toddler isn't quite used to our new house so he hasn't been sleeping well. Things have just been so crazy with our move, kitchen renovation, painting, organizing, etc. my poor children must feel so out of sorts!! [emoji17]
I'm so grateful others are smaller too, it's so hard when so many people comment, it starts to make you doubt your own feelings and health!
I'm so glad everyone has had healthy ultrasounds!! I can't wait to have mine and see baby again. [emoji5]
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He doesn't really realize that c/s are major surgery does he. Our society has really trivialized what is a big deal and is life saving surgery, which should be saved for when lives are at risk. I wouldn't want to look after twins with a c/s. It was hard enough to pick up even one child. Not to mention the restrictions on picking up older kids and driving etc.Quote:
Originally Posted by BunnyGirl19
Do what feels right to you, cos you are the one who has to live it.
Two girls and one boy, due October 16
Agreed. Unless he is willing to volunteer to take a few weeks off work to help, then *if* vag is a safe option, your doc is on board and you feel it's best in your gut then you have to at least try. I know DH is prob just worried about you and the babies but it's kinda like labor... men will never fully understand it because even if they do have a surgery that leaves them with a massive incision they won't have to take care of newborn(s) and other older children during recovery.Quote:
Originally Posted by Bella29
That being said.. were you knocked out for your 1st c-section? The reason I ask is because I was knocked out for my first one and it really took a toll on me. 8 weeks out I was JUST STARTING to feel like anything close to myself. My 2nd I got the spinal and was able to move around after surgery instead of being unconscious nearly the entire first 24 hours. The second one was 10x easier on me. Having had many other abdominal surgeries I've learned that if you are still your muscle get stiff, making it even more painful to move which makes you want to be even more still and it's just a big circle. With my 2nd, I was active as I could be post-op. I even helped the nurses by lifting my top half with my arms while they changed my pad because I was numb and couldn't do it all myself. After the numbness wore off I was sore but nothing close to what I'd experienced with my first. I could get up and go to the restroom, or up stairs with minimal pain as long as I had my pain killers on board. With my first, even with pain killers, stairs were a non-option and going to the bathroom was terribly painful for weeks. I am a firm believer that this was because I was mobile immediately post-op the 2nd time as opposed to the unconscious blob I was post op with my first. So... if you find that baby doesn't turn, or for whatever reason you end up w/ a c-section if it's not an emergency situation and you can get the spinal you *may* find your recovery to be a bit easier this go-around.
Bunny- I'm a leader of my local ICAN group. We educate women to make the best birthing decisions for themselves without the influence of schedule. ACOG says that twin births are nothing to be wary of. If one twin is head down, the ease of birth should be equal to a singleton birth. I would very much encourage you to research a lot and show your husband just how beneficial and SAFE a twin vaginal birth is. Your recovery will be IMMENSELY easier and caring for twins you will need as much pep in your step as you can get. I'm a huge advocate for vaginal birth as the always first resort (even after a cesarean) and the use of cesareans when medically NECESSARY. If you have a dr who practices evidence based care, they too will know that a twin vaginal delivery isn't something to run from. Good luck in making your decision. Just remember... Your body, your choice... Do not let hit husband scare you into doing something that doesn't feel right for you.
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I'm with the rest of the ladies Bunny..if you've done your research and it feels right to you go for vaginal. Lots of luck and I'm sorry you aren't feeling supported.
I just had a spinal with my section, and I wasn't numb enough when they started cutting so it was really painful. It was an emergency though, so it's not like we could just sit there and wait to see if it worked better first. My doctor is very pro VBAC (I had one with DS3) and is in favor of vaginal delivery with the twins as long as they meet criteria. So far only some are met. Twin A is larger and his previa has resolved. He's not head down though. Twin B is, but that doesn't matter because she isn't the one whose sac connects to my cervix and wouldn't be born first. We're going to decide closer to when I'm expected to deliver which option is the best choice for safe delivery. If I need a c-section I'm okay with that. I just want choices if that makes sense.
DH doesn't get that it's major surgery. The only surgery he's had is tubes in his ears as a kid and when he had a stent placed after a heart attack. None of those required much recovery or anything else. I don't think he understands what surgery is like since he's never had it.
Sounds to me like your dr is vbac supportive then BG. Perhaps as it gets closer if the decision to vbac is made you can take hubby along so that he is able to here from your OBs why it is safe and he might be more supportive. I often find dads are much more open after they have a chance to ask questions, but at the end of the day, it's your choice. Oh and hey remember breech is possible too. I have several friends who have breech vbac'd so something to discuss with your OB if you are interested.
Two girls and one boy, due October 16
I'm off for my morphology scan this arvo. Wish me luck!
Two girls and one boy, due October 16
Oh my! That sounds excruciating & traumatic! (((Hugs)))Quote:
Originally Posted by BunnyGirl19
🙏 for a healthy 🌈 🚼 We're having a girl! 🎀👗
TwoInTow83 Ovulation charts on FertilityFriend.com
How'd it go??Quote:
Originally Posted by Bella29
Today is the day I find out gender. I'm dreading it. Please send peace my way... I need peace in my heart.
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How long until your u/s? I hope you hear girl but if you hear boy it's okay to grieve the loss of a dream. Feel what you need to feel, don't try to push it down and ignore it. The sooner you deal with the feelings the sooner you'll get to get excited about some of the perks that come with having two of the same gender. Praying for peace in your heart as you go to your ultrasound, knowing that whatever you learn is the way it was meant to be.Quote:
Originally Posted by Laurenk1424
20 weeks today :D Over halfway to D-day(since I have to deliver a week early)! And no hiding I am preg at this point lol. Hard to believe... I went from just having my normal jiggly, but slightly firmer to the touch, tummy to looking like I swallowed a watermelon... just in the last few weeks! It's like my body suddenly remembered "Oh wait... she doesn't get a cute little tiny bump! She gets a ginormous one! Better catch up!!" Lol.
Attachment 31388
ETA: Had to pull my shirt tight this time. Pics kept looking like I just stuffed a pillow in my shirt or something lol.
Can't wait to hear how scans go!
Awe yay for bellies! I'm still smaller this time around I feel like..but gaining weight steadily nonetheless..everyone says I look tiny and I definitely have a belly but could still hide if I wanted to. I'll post a pic later.Quote:
Originally Posted by twointow83
Can't wait! I love seeing bumps :DQuote:
Originally Posted by lala22
It's a boy.
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Hugs. I am sorry u are hurting right now :( we are here if u need to vent.Quote:
Originally Posted by Laurenk1424
🙏 for a healthy 🌈 🚼 We're having a girl! 🎀👗
TwoInTow83 Ovulation charts on FertilityFriend.com
Sorry Lauren...I thought for sure you would come back and say girl. Hope you're doing ok.Quote:
Originally Posted by Laurenk1424
I'm sorry.
Oh Lauren! I'm sorry love.
Our scan was good. Kids enjoyed it. So did we. Bubs looks super healthy :). We are still team green. There were no accidental glimpses of anything gender related so no further clues. I might show a skull pic later but I'm being naughty at work so I won't just yet.
Two girls and one boy, due October 16
Laurenk, I'm sorry you didn't hear pink [emoji20]. You did the best you could and know we are all here for you. Give yourself some time.
Huge hugs!
[emoji170]DS1[emoji1379], DS2[emoji577], & DS3[emoji602][emoji170]
[emoji166]One last pink sway 2016[emoji166]
My Ovulation Chart
My husband is out of town and it drives me batty that he can go without checking in, seeing how the kids are, seeing if I've lost my mind when if I was gone..I would be checking in constantly to make sure all is well. Literally drives me insane and takes everything I have not to actually get mad and say something. Ok, end rant. Lol
Bella, everything ok?
🙏 for a healthy 🌈 🚼 We're having a girl! 🎀👗
TwoInTow83 Ovulation charts on FertilityFriend.com
Yeah all good two. I still think this is going to be a girl. Still not sure how I feel, but she will be a healthy girl I think and that is really important. See my Mw tomorrow for the first time since 13 weeks cos her dad died a couple of weeks ago and so she went away to his funeral. So that will be nice.Quote:
Originally Posted by twointow83
Two girls and one boy, due October 16
I'm so sorry, Lauren! Hugs. Please do feel free to vent away if needed. We totally get it here.
Glad to hear your scan went well. I always get nervous when ppl say they are going to a scan and then don't say how it went. My personal hang up, due to having all preg bad new come from scans. So I am very relieved all is well with your bub [emoji3]Quote:
Originally Posted by Bella29
🙏 for a healthy 🌈 🚼 We're having a girl! 🎀👗
TwoInTow83 Ovulation charts on FertilityFriend.com
Sooo sorry Lauren!
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26 weeks
Attachment 31429