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  1. #1531
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    I told DH I hoped baby A flipped head down soon and stayed that way so I could have the option of a vaginal delivery. He told me he wants me to have a c-section instead. I a section with DD and aside from the five days I spent in the hospital I had no time to take it easy and recover. I was discharged in the late afternoon and the next morning I was completely on my own with two toddlers plus whatever my mom needed help with (her husband had passed away a couple weeks prior plus she was getting ready to have quadruple bypass surgery). I was in so much pain trying to do what needed to be done and I healed very slowly because of lack of rest. I fully expect it to be the same this time as well, except I have four kids 5 and under at home already and won't have more than minimal help, if any. DH thinks I'm overreacting. And then he goes and schedules a 4-day business trip when I'm 33 weeks pregnant, which means I'm pretty much screwed if I go into labor then. Unless I can get MIL to come watch my kids I have no one, and even then I can't count on her to show up quickly if she did come and I had a really short labor, just over 3 hours, with my last pregnancy.
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  2. #1532
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    Two, I think my toddler isn't quite used to our new house so he hasn't been sleeping well. Things have just been so crazy with our move, kitchen renovation, painting, organizing, etc. my poor children must feel so out of sorts!! [emoji17]

    I'm so grateful others are smaller too, it's so hard when so many people comment, it starts to make you doubt your own feelings and health!

    I'm so glad everyone has had healthy ultrasounds!! I can't wait to have mine and see baby again. [emoji5]


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  3. #1533
    Quote Originally Posted by BunnyGirl19 View Post
    I told DH I hoped baby A flipped head down soon and stayed that way so I could have the option of a vaginal delivery. He told me he wants me to have a c-section instead. I a section with DD and aside from the five days I spent in the hospital I had no time to take it easy and recover. I was discharged in the late afternoon and the next morning I was completely on my own with two toddlers plus whatever my mom needed help with (her husband had passed away a couple weeks prior plus she was getting ready to have quadruple bypass surgery). I was in so much pain trying to do what needed to be done and I healed very slowly because of lack of rest. I fully expect it to be the same this time as well, except I have four kids 5 and under at home already and won't have more than minimal help, if any. DH thinks I'm overreacting. And then he goes and schedules a 4-day business trip when I'm 33 weeks pregnant, which means I'm pretty much screwed if I go into labor then. Unless I can get MIL to come watch my kids I have no one, and even then I can't count on her to show up quickly if she did come and I had a really short labor, just over 3 hours, with my last pregnancy.
    He doesn't really realize that c/s are major surgery does he. Our society has really trivialized what is a big deal and is life saving surgery, which should be saved for when lives are at risk. I wouldn't want to look after twins with a c/s. It was hard enough to pick up even one child. Not to mention the restrictions on picking up older kids and driving etc.

    Do what feels right to you, cos you are the one who has to live it.


    Two girls and one boy, due October 16
    DD in 2009
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    Swayed with GD in 2013 and had a beautiful DS in 2014
    Currently TTC another blue bundle. Wish me luck!

  4. #1534
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    twointow83's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bella29 View Post
    He doesn't really realize that c/s are major surgery does he. Our society has really trivialized what is a big deal and is life saving surgery, which should be saved for when lives are at risk. I wouldn't want to look after twins with a c/s. It was hard enough to pick up even one child. Not to mention the restrictions on picking up older kids and driving etc.

    Do what feels right to you, cos you are the one who has to live it.


    Two girls and one boy, due October 16
    Agreed. Unless he is willing to volunteer to take a few weeks off work to help, then *if* vag is a safe option, your doc is on board and you feel it's best in your gut then you have to at least try. I know DH is prob just worried about you and the babies but it's kinda like labor... men will never fully understand it because even if they do have a surgery that leaves them with a massive incision they won't have to take care of newborn(s) and other older children during recovery.

    That being said.. were you knocked out for your 1st c-section? The reason I ask is because I was knocked out for my first one and it really took a toll on me. 8 weeks out I was JUST STARTING to feel like anything close to myself. My 2nd I got the spinal and was able to move around after surgery instead of being unconscious nearly the entire first 24 hours. The second one was 10x easier on me. Having had many other abdominal surgeries I've learned that if you are still your muscle get stiff, making it even more painful to move which makes you want to be even more still and it's just a big circle. With my 2nd, I was active as I could be post-op. I even helped the nurses by lifting my top half with my arms while they changed my pad because I was numb and couldn't do it all myself. After the numbness wore off I was sore but nothing close to what I'd experienced with my first. I could get up and go to the restroom, or up stairs with minimal pain as long as I had my pain killers on board. With my first, even with pain killers, stairs were a non-option and going to the bathroom was terribly painful for weeks. I am a firm believer that this was because I was mobile immediately post-op the 2nd time as opposed to the unconscious blob I was post op with my first. So... if you find that baby doesn't turn, or for whatever reason you end up w/ a c-section if it's not an emergency situation and you can get the spinal you *may* find your recovery to be a bit easier this go-around.
    Our family is complete
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  5. #1535
    Bunny- I'm a leader of my local ICAN group. We educate women to make the best birthing decisions for themselves without the influence of schedule. ACOG says that twin births are nothing to be wary of. If one twin is head down, the ease of birth should be equal to a singleton birth. I would very much encourage you to research a lot and show your husband just how beneficial and SAFE a twin vaginal birth is. Your recovery will be IMMENSELY easier and caring for twins you will need as much pep in your step as you can get. I'm a huge advocate for vaginal birth as the always first resort (even after a cesarean) and the use of cesareans when medically NECESSARY. If you have a dr who practices evidence based care, they too will know that a twin vaginal delivery isn't something to run from. Good luck in making your decision. Just remember... Your body, your choice... Do not let hit husband scare you into doing something that doesn't feel right for you.


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  6. #1536
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    lala22's Avatar
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    I'm with the rest of the ladies Bunny..if you've done your research and it feels right to you go for vaginal. Lots of luck and I'm sorry you aren't feeling supported.
    Mama to one 6 yr old and one 20 month old

    Expecting a

  7. #1537
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    I just had a spinal with my section, and I wasn't numb enough when they started cutting so it was really painful. It was an emergency though, so it's not like we could just sit there and wait to see if it worked better first. My doctor is very pro VBAC (I had one with DS3) and is in favor of vaginal delivery with the twins as long as they meet criteria. So far only some are met. Twin A is larger and his previa has resolved. He's not head down though. Twin B is, but that doesn't matter because she isn't the one whose sac connects to my cervix and wouldn't be born first. We're going to decide closer to when I'm expected to deliver which option is the best choice for safe delivery. If I need a c-section I'm okay with that. I just want choices if that makes sense.

    DH doesn't get that it's major surgery. The only surgery he's had is tubes in his ears as a kid and when he had a stent placed after a heart attack. None of those required much recovery or anything else. I don't think he understands what surgery is like since he's never had it.
    DH (43), DW (40)

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  8. #1538
    Sounds to me like your dr is vbac supportive then BG. Perhaps as it gets closer if the decision to vbac is made you can take hubby along so that he is able to here from your OBs why it is safe and he might be more supportive. I often find dads are much more open after they have a chance to ask questions, but at the end of the day, it's your choice. Oh and hey remember breech is possible too. I have several friends who have breech vbac'd so something to discuss with your OB if you are interested.


    Two girls and one boy, due October 16
    DD in 2009
    DD2 in 2012
    Swayed with GD in 2013 and had a beautiful DS in 2014
    Currently TTC another blue bundle. Wish me luck!

  9. #1539
    I'm off for my morphology scan this arvo. Wish me luck!


    Two girls and one boy, due October 16
    DD in 2009
    DD2 in 2012
    Swayed with GD in 2013 and had a beautiful DS in 2014
    Currently TTC another blue bundle. Wish me luck!

  10. #1540
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    Quote Originally Posted by BunnyGirl19 View Post
    I just had a spinal with my section, and I wasn't numb enough when they started cutting so it was really painful. It was an emergency though, so it's not like we could just sit there and wait to see if it worked better first. My doctor is very pro VBAC (I had one with DS3) and is in favor of vaginal delivery with the twins as long as they meet criteria. So far only some are met. Twin A is larger and his previa has resolved. He's not head down though. Twin B is, but that doesn't matter because she isn't the one whose sac connects to my cervix and wouldn't be born first. We're going to decide closer to when I'm expected to deliver which option is the best choice for safe delivery. If I need a c-section I'm okay with that. I just want choices if that makes sense.

    DH doesn't get that it's major surgery. The only surgery he's had is tubes in his ears as a kid and when he had a stent placed after a heart attack. None of those required much recovery or anything else. I don't think he understands what surgery is like since he's never had it.
    Oh my! That sounds excruciating & traumatic! (((Hugs)))

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