Update about me and my infertility
hi everyone again, :)
I wanted to just post an update about what's been happening with me and my family. I had to take a break from the boards for my own sanity, as we watched our issue go from gender swaying to watching our fertility crumble over the last few years. It's been a difficult run since our failed HRC cycle in 2014.
Once I would've given anything to have a baby girl - now I would mortgage my house just to have another healthy baby at all.
It's all in my signature, lol, but to summarize: After the failed HRC attempt in Oct 2014 we tried on our own for another 5 months with no bfp. We weren't even swaying by then, just trying hard to get pregnant at all. By May 2015 we started at our local fertility clinic and ran a whole new round of pretesting. Nothing new on my end except I'm now on the wrong side of 36, but the strict Kruger SA on DH showed only 4% morphology. :(
We did a few Femara rounds with natural bd'ing. After two rounds of 2.5mg Femara we got a bfp in July, only to miscarry a few weeks later. This was our second loss in a row, but my RE refused to do all the RPL testing as he said it was probably just a fluke as our last loss was way back in 2013.
During these months I also did two saline sonos - both of which couldn't get through my right tube. :( They can't confirm if it's a true blockage without an HSG which I haven't done yet. But my right ovary is the superactive one and my left lazy, so if my right tube is broken that is really not good.
So we did a few more rounds of Femara, and after another 4 cycles managed to get another bfp in Nov. Betas this time were excellent and I was on prog supplements right away. At 7w1d I found out I had a MMC and that I'd be miscarrying over Christmas. WORST CHRISTMAS EVER.
I had to take a few months off to wait for my period to normalize, and my RE finally ordered a full RPL panel. I'm still waiting on one more clotting test but so far everything has come back normal, so now our RPL is unexplained except for me having crappy quality eggs. My RE is also convinced I have DOR though I question that dx.
Ontario started to fund IVF, and I get one lifetime cycle. So I finally got to try IVF again this past month. Unfortunately the stim phase didn't go very well and we got extremely uneven growth with 3 leading follies, so we ended up converting to an IUI. We just did the IUI yesterday morning with a postwash count of 17mil, 94% motility and 89% rapid motility. I triggered with two big follicles on the right and one mature on the left - I'm praying the trigger will force out the left follicle as that's the side I really need!
In the meantime, a new neighbour just moved in, already has a pidgeon pair and is preggo. My best friend after a round of IVF and many years IF is also due with a new baby girl this month. I'm happy for my friend (and bitter at my neighbour) but it's all an extra kick in the teeth.
So in summary, my sordid fertility problems now include: aging eggs, poor IVF responder, blocked right tube, male factor morphology, repeated loss. I wish I could just walk away and stop and call my family complete but I can't - I really want another baby. :(
If there's one silver lining to the hell that secondary infertility has been for us, it's that it makes me all THAT much more grateful for my boys. I think everyday, gosh, thank goodness we tried when we were young. If we'd waited till thirty I could've been sitting here with all my infertility issues and no kids at all. So I'm grateful for that. I don't know where we're going from here - for now I'm thinking I'd like to try a few more IUI's with injectables to test my response, as apparently I'm very weird and don't fit any of the usual protocols. I only get one more IVF attempt that's covered as I will not be allowed to cancel again - so I HAVE to get it right next time. Going forward, I'm thinking about donor embies or donor eggs, but it'll be awhile before I'm ready for that I think.
So that's my last few years in a nutshell! PM's welcome for anyone who wants to chat about IF and doesn't feel comfortable posting on an open board. :)
