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  1. #1
    Moderator
    Pbn3's Avatar
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    My goodbye for now - a poem

    Hi all, I'm stepping away for awhile but thought I'd leave you all with something I penned this afternoon (after many wines &#128514 and yes I know I'm weird lol but I have no one IRL to share my feelings with...

    Just have a look at me smiling
    Lucky you can't see beneath
    The sadness that I feel inside
    So overwhelming

    I still laugh at funny pictures
    And write my funny texts
    But little do you understand
    I've been through life's hardest test

    For those that know I've lost a bub
    Before they're even born
    You're weeks are all just new ones
    Yet everyday I mourn

    While you try your best to comfort me
    With 'verses' well rehearsed
    None of it means anything
    Doesn't lessen all my hurt

    Months have passed and days tick by
    To you I'm yesterdays news
    Yet here I am sobbing inside
    This month was my date due

    I know you just dont get it
    And pray god you never do
    This feeling of hopelessness
    I'd NEVER wish on you

    So forgive me if I drink to much
    Or say things out of line
    I'm going through something
    I'd NEVER wish on ANYONE in my life

    I feel broken up and shattered
    And you will not understand
    That I long for just another chance
    To be pregnant once again

    But that's ok and like I said
    I don't want you where I am
    I know misery loves company
    But this time she is BANNED

    For I'm hopeful for the future
    But terrified as well
    I hope my rainbow baby comes

    And for all those that have miscarried

    I HOPE YOURS DOES AS WELL

    Sent from my GT-I9305T using Tapatalk
    Last edited by Pbn3; August 18th, 2016 at 04:22 AM.

  2. #2
    Big Dreamer

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    Xxxx Pbn, have faith that your day will come, never stop believing.
    2004: 2011

    Dreaming of pink

  3. #3
    Moderator
    Pbn3's Avatar
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    Thank you pinkpony xxoo I so so hope to see you with a bfp when I come back!!!

    Sent from my GT-I9305T using Tapatalk

  4. #4
    Dream Vet
    purple's Avatar
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    I hope you will be back again soon Pbn with some happy news.

    Until then take care xx

    Sept 2008 Sept 2011 March 2017



  5. #5
    Dream Vet
    twointow83's Avatar
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    Mar 2015
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    Much love hun. This is beautiful.
    Our family is complete
    My precious babies: 2006 , 2010 2016
    Too beautiful for earth: 2009- (20+5). 2015- (8w), CP, (8w)

    Please pardon typos~ Nursing @ keyboard

  6. #6
    Beautiful! Sorry but I'm not saying goodbye I'll continue to message you [emoji846]

    Your turn come October [emoji179][emoji166]


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

  7. #7
    Moderator
    XXforhubby's Avatar
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    Awe! Huge hugs sweetie! I don't do goodbye's [emoji6], and I'll message you from time to time for updates!

    [emoji8]




    [emoji170]DS1[emoji1379], DS2 [emoji602], & DS3 [emoji577][emoji170]
    [emoji166]One last pink sway 2016[emoji166]
    My Ovulation Chart

  8. #8
    Swaying Advice Coach
    atomic sagebrush's Avatar
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    please let us know how you're getting on. You've always been such a help and I hope to hear from you very soon with good news.
    !!! Questions?? Check out the NEW and improved Complete Index !!!

    If you appreciate my help with your sway plan, please consider a donation:

    https://www.paypal.com/donate?hosted_button_id=C92U9TVWTRTDQ

  9. #9
    Dream Vet
    essnce629's Avatar
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    I'm crying reading this Pbn3. I feel the exact same way and have thought of leaving the boards. (((HUGS))) to you and feel free to PM me if you ever want to talk and be depressed together.

    Sent from my SM-J700P using Tapatalk
    Me: 35 years old. Was an infant nanny and birth and postpartum doula. Now a full time SAHM.
    DS1: Aug 2003 (my first home birthed water baby!)
    DS2: May 2009 (my second home birthed water baby!)
    Oct 2014
    July 2016: Laproscopic surgery to remove a ping pong ball sized endometrioma on left ovary and 3 pea size fibroids on outside of uterus. Hysteroscopy to remove one larger "penetrating fibroid" inside uterus.
    Oct 2016: Heartbroken after DH's vasectomy. Looks like my dreams of a daughter are gone.

  10. #10
    Hugs pbn. Hope your back with good news 😙

    Sent from my SM-G935F using Tapatalk

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