Interesting poll over on Facebook right now

[Ribbons]

I obviously only have boys - so does my sister - but I can tell you for a FACT that my teenage boy is a TERROR sometimes, and sometimes the sweetest thing ever. (He was a challenge to raise too, but he has autism so not sure if that is a fair comparison.) DS2 is quiet, loving, and calm most of the time, but he is very clingy. My sister's boys are like little tornadoes and always have been, wreaking destruction and mischief everywhere they go! They have bright red hair and are close in age, so I like to call them Fred and George Weasley from the Harry Potter books - that's what they are like. My SIL's three boys are also little tornadoes and her girl was always sweet and calm - until she hit teenagerhood a year or so ago, now she is rude, annoying and vindictive (can't wait til she grows out of that, OMG)

My mother had two girls and a boy, and she says that girls are easy when they are younger and harder when they are older, and boys are vice versa. That being said, she says she really appreciates her girls because we are much closer as adults.

So, I guess if there is something to it, you pay for it now or later!

[auroara78]

I agree with PoP about personality big time!! I was just like you PoP, such a good girl! LOL, I didn't have sex until I was 20because I just waited. I read and wrote a lot when I was younger, and was very good, very out of trouble, and my siblings were the same! I have two older sisters and 1 brother, and we were all lame like that, LOL. Just really good in school, non-trouble-makers.

If you asked my mom though, she would say that us girls are cruel to her now (we dont' call her enough, that's why we're so bad) and my brother was the easiest because he (always calls her) but she claims he was easiest to raise, but I don't remember us causing her any more grief than he did.

I was just about to write a post about this because every since I found out I'm having a girl, there's been a backlash of negative comments about the teenage years are going to be utter hell, boys are easier, and now we're going to be in "trouble"...yet i know plenty of mishcevious boys in my past that prob. gave their parents headaches too, so I really am getting PISSED off at this idea that girls are so awful and tough to raise, and boys are so easy, because boys have their challenges too.

I think my DS1 with his mellow personality will continue to be a joy to be around and prob. stay easy. DS2 with his mischevious smiles and laughing when you scold him will probably be a challenge. I don't think this is inherent in their gender, but of course personality. Who knows what DD will throw at us?

[Junie]

So, I guess if there is something to it, you pay for it now or later!

I love this!!

[dramabird]

I think I was pretty darn easy as a teenager. I liked my parents and had a good relationship with them, so being smart-mouthed or sulky just wasn't my thing. I'd say that the hardest thing about me was that I had relatively low self-esteem and I desperately wanted a boyfriend. All my friends had boyfriends and I was always the single one, so I don't know how many tearful nights my parents had to spend talking to me that everything would work out (and it did ... I married a tall, lean, handsome doctor, who is still my best friend after 11 years together and is an amazing father). But I'm sure they could have done without *that* teen drama.

Otherwise, though, I just wasn't trouble. Didn't have my first kiss until I was a freshman in college, didn't drink until college (so, yes, underage, but in a pretty tame environment), never did drugs (heck, I've never even smoked a single cigarette), got straight A's in high school and quite high grades in college, and didn't have sex until I got married (DH was very patient during our dating years ... I told you he was great! ).

And both my DH and his brother were easy teens. Great grades, stayed out of trouble, tended to date the same girls for quite a long period of time, and they both ended up as physicians.

My brother was always a sweet, nice kid, also did great in school (beat my ACT score by like three points, the stinker!). He tended to do stupid things with his friends ("Jackass" was a big show when he was in high school, so they loved to see how much they could embarrass or injure each other), but he continues to be a great guy overall. He's 24 now and is a fabulous uncle to my kids. He graduated recently and now works as an engineer. His biggest issue? He wants a girlfriend!! Just like his big sister, he's a late social bloomer (I don't get it, because he's six feet tall, has big muscles, a good job and is super sweet) and he has the same "I want to be in love!!!" thing I had going on when I was younger, too.

So, my way-too-long anecdotal point is: boys or girls, they can all be pretty darn good as teenagers.

With my own two boys ... our older one was an incredibly difficult baby: colic, severe eczema, spit up like a fountain constantly, plus he had a rare heart condition that required monitoring and medication. The heart condition ended up going away on its own without the cryoablation they thought would be necessary when he was older (NOBODY wants to put their 3- or 4-year-old under anesthesia to have part of his heart frozen, for crying out loud!) but then we started noticing that he was speech delayed and quite sensitive to sensory things (the sound of ripping duct tape would make him dissolve into tears as a baby) and ultimately he was diagnosed as being on the very mild end of the autism spectrum. So it felt like the poor guy just got one thing after another after another. He still has challenges with behavior (sensitivity, breakdowns), so he has a para at school, but he excels academically (he was reading at 2.5 which, unbeknownst to us at the time, was actually one of the red flags of being on the spectrum). And while as a baby and toddler he wasn't particularly affectionate or cuddly, he is now my absolute sweetheart at age 6. He always wants to crawl in our bed and cuddle, he says he's going to marry me when he grows up and he recently said, "Mommy, I will never forget to steal your heart." So a hard baby and toddler, absolutely, but in many ways has gotten so much easier.

DS2 was an easy baby who slept all the time and ate well (although he had the eczema and spitting up even worse than DS1 did) ... and then he turned into monster-boy at about 18 months. He's incredibly bright, soooooo verbal (which is refreshing after the issues we had with DS1) ... but obstinate and contrary to beat the band. As someone said recently, you say up, he says down, you tell him to quit, he'll do the naughty thing that much faster.

But I do kind of wonder how much of that is just being a kid, too? I mean, we'll hang out with other people's children, boys and girls, and I'll see unappealing characteristics in both. Wild girls, sulky boys, manipulative girls, rude boys ... it truly does seem to differ from kid to kid, not from pink to blue. Even things like potty-training seem to vary (I had a friend whose little boy was trained right on the dot at 2 and another whose daughter fought it out until 3-1/2). What they tell you at ultrasound or in the delivery room just isn't any sort of guarantee for hard or easy infancies, toddlerhoods or teen years.

For whatever reason, DH and I got kids who are harder than either he or I were when we were little, or than either of our brothers are. But it's just how the dice were rolled, not because they're boys. I have said that I would take a sweet, gentle, mellow, verbal DS3 over a DD that would be just as hard as our first son was the first several years.

That being said ... I would take a sweetgentlemellowverbal DD -- who says I have to choose?

[Hobbermittens]

Well, I don't know about girls, but my oldest son was absolutely horrific to raise! He had (and still has, sigh) such a mouth on him...oh, my gosh. If you say black, he says white; you say up, he says down. He'll argue with a post.

Oh that is my DD1! She would argue the color of an orange! Makes me CRAZY. She also always has to have the last word in every argument, so sometimes I just walk away in the middle of her arguing and closet he door behind me. It may be rude, but I just can't take it!

[Ribbons]

Oh that is my DD1! She would argue the color of an orange! Makes me CRAZY. She also always has to have the last word in every argument, so sometimes I just walk away in the middle of her arguing and closet he door behind me. It may be rude, but I just can't take it!

I do the same thing with DS1!!! But he won't let me leave for long, he'll follow me into the other room, arguing until I either lose my temper or give in. sigh.

[Ribbons]

dramabird, you must have some pretty amazing parents to put out such great kids!

My parents were VERY strict - loving, but waaaaay too sheltering. It worked pretty well on my sister - she was mild-mannered, didn't have sex until marriage and ended up being Valedictorian... but I am a wild fire dragon Aries and was hellspawn by 15! It's amazing I don't have a record I've mellowed out considerably now but my mother said raising me was the hardest thing she's ever done. My brother wasn't much better than me (also Aries), but he grew up to be a great guy too!

[Hobbermittens]

dramabird, you must have some pretty amazing parents to put out such great kids!

My parents were VERY strict - loving, but waaaaay too sheltering. It worked pretty well on my sister - she was mild-mannered, didn't have sex until marriage and ended up being Valedictorian... but I am a wild fire dragon Aries and was hellspawn by 15! It's amazing I don't have a record I've mellowed out considerably now but my mother said raising me was the hardest thing she's ever done. My brother wasn't much better than me (also Aries), but he grew up to be a great guy too!

AAAAahhhh! I have 2 Aries daughters, and they are both difficult! I seriously wonder how many "difficult" kids are fire signs... I am a Sagittarius and I was a wild child pain in the ass... I did a poll on IG about this, maybe I will do one here! Were you year of the Dragon too?

[Ribbons]

AAAAahhhh! I have 2 Aries daughters, and they are both difficult! I seriously wonder how many "difficult" kids are fire signs... I am a Sagittarius and I was a wild child pain in the ass... I did a poll on IG about this, maybe I will do one here! Were you year of the Dragon too?

Yep! 1977!

Update: Well, I was looking up future baby signs and I am a silly girl I am not year of the Dragon, DH is! I am year of the Snake. LOL - and I've been thinking all these years I was a Dragon...

Snake doesn't seem so bad, we are supposed to be prosperous / good with money (waiting for that to kick in any day now!! )

[coocoobananas]

Wow! Does being a sag and dragon year explain why I was worse than my bro and sis?! I was probably not wild compared to most, but I was a kiss ass tll about 16 and then I just remember in an instant I changed my ways and became quite naughty and rebellious!!
Btw, I have 1 even tempered boy and 1 wild child! I hate how people say "oh 2 boys! You must have your hands full!
I may have agreed if I had 2 like my youngest, but my first is like the reputation of what girls are like! They are both so awesome, and both personalities come with their pros and cons!!