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  1. #4791
    Quote Originally Posted by Brandles View Post
    You poor thing. Hugs!! Its hard not to think about it and obsess. It's been confirmed 3 times that I'm having a girl and I'm still obsessing. I can't even bring myself to publicly announce it until after my anatomy scan. Sigh!!
    Over lunch today my husband said he would really personally want to stop at two for eco reasons with overpopulation... and I told him for me I don't want to make any permanent plans because I'd be open to a third dependent on if I felt like I still wasn't complete. We're planning on adopting in the future, too, so either way we'll end up with a big family.

    However, it just made me want to sit and stare at the nub in the images of mine even more. It's like... it does look like a lot of the confirmed girl nubs, but it also looks like the boy ones... which is just crazy-inducing.

    I'll be just as happy with a boy, I totally will. I don't think I'd get depressed at all if it's a boy. But it's that thing... I'm in it, so I sort of want and am leaning towards it (in wanting a girl)... and I never had this anxiousness before the scan with my son. So it's kind of annoying me and I can't shake it!
    2010 - 1 DS
    2012 - Tried for a DD , and it worked!
    2013 - DD
    2017 - DD - didn't sway***


  2. #4792
    I think it's pretty normal Suregena, I was only nervous to find out if everything was ok when I had my scan with ds1 gender really didn't matter at all. With ds2 I hoped it was a girl as it would take the pressure off when we had a third (as we always planned to have three) but at the same time as we had a small age gap between them I thought a little brother close in age would be really nice too.
    This time the pressure just felt crazy and it was horrible, I had all the usual nerves of whether everything was going to be ok with the baby and on top of that the overwhelming desire for it to be a girl which I absolutely hated.

    Even now I have got my head around another boy and we have pretty much agreed on the name I'm still hoping they may have got it wrong and that by some miracle when I have my scan at 32 weeks they'll tell me the penis has vanished and it is a girl after all! Mental.

    I am considering a 4th, but in all honesty I hope that once I'm holding my new little man I'll feel that my family is complete. I'm not sure I believe the sadness over never having a daughter will ever properly go though.
    DS1 - 4.5yrs DS2 - 3yrs

    Swayed for a but expecting a beautiful

    My gorgeous son has arrived!

  3. #4793
    I know. I have three aunts. One aunt has three boys. The other has 2 boys. The third has 1 girl (my only girl 1st cousin on my mom's side whose like my sister! We're so close in age... months difference) and 1 boy. Then my mom has three boys and 1 girl (me). My husband has two brothers (one is no longer alive... died in the '90s.) His dad had two brothers. My mom, though, was a family of four girls. So pretty heavily surrounded by boys!

    However, my oldest brother has 1 boy and 1 girl. My second oldest brother has 1 boy and 1 girl. So, it's all strange... that desire... that want of a sort of balance. But knowing my grandparents, they never showed a hint of wishing they had a boy because look... they ended up surrounded by grandsons galore! And my aunts with only boys seem perfectly content. So I figure if that is to be my path, too, that I will also have that content feeling.

    My mother in law is VERY bitter and resentful she never had a girl and she has put immense verbal pressure on me to be the one to get her that girl, which is really, really irritating, to be honest.

    It's hard. But I'm certain you'll be in love with your little boy, like I would be if this turns out to be a boy. They're all such individuals that in the end, what does the gender matter? It's hard to try to shake the GD, though, for sure.
    2010 - 1 DS
    2012 - Tried for a DD , and it worked!
    2013 - DD
    2017 - DD - didn't sway***


  4. #4794
    Dream Vet
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    Quote Originally Posted by suregena View Post
    I know. I have three aunts. One aunt has three boys. The other has 2 boys. The third has 1 girl (my only girl 1st cousin on my mom's side whose like my sister! We're so close in age... months difference) and 1 boy. Then my mom has three boys and 1 girl (me). My husband has two brothers (one is no longer alive... died in the '90s.) His dad had two brothers. My mom, though, was a family of four girls. So pretty heavily surrounded by boys!

    However, my oldest brother has 1 boy and 1 girl. My second oldest brother has 1 boy and 1 girl. So, it's all strange... that desire... that want of a sort of balance. But knowing my grandparents, they never showed a hint of wishing they had a boy because look... they ended up surrounded by grandsons galore! And my aunts with only boys seem perfectly content. So I figure if that is to be my path, too, that I will also have that content feeling.

    My mother in law is VERY bitter and resentful she never had a girl and she has put immense verbal pressure on me to be the one to get her that girl, which is really, really irritating, to be honest.

    It's hard. But I'm certain you'll be in love with your little boy, like I would be if this turns out to be a boy. They're all such individuals that in the end, what does the gender matter? It's hard to try to shake the GD, though, for sure.

    I hope I don't end up the bitter mil who never had a girl but maybe you could talk to her about it? Speaking now from personal experience, it is a very hard pill to swallow and her bitterness is probably stemmed from sadness. Maybe just let her know that you acknowledge her loss but that you are trying to stay positive and really ok with another boy and that her feelings are putting a lot of pressure on you and that is defiantly not fair!
    I hope you do have peace if its a boy, its a horrible feeling not to and I wouldn't wish it on anyone! I wish I'd always have happy days about it (cause I do) but its hard, it just doesn't seem fair:/
    7
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    Had my first and only little girl Emmerson oct 19,2014 right on her due date!
    Hoping I stop calling her 'little dude, bud' and him real soon

  5. #4795
    Quote Originally Posted by coocoobananas View Post
    I hope I don't end up the bitter mil who never had a girl but maybe you could talk to her about it? Speaking now from personal experience, it is a very hard pill to swallow and her bitterness is probably stemmed from sadness. Maybe just let her know that you acknowledge her loss but that you are trying to stay positive and really ok with another boy and that her feelings are putting a lot of pressure on you and that is defiantly not fair!
    I hope you do have peace if its a boy, its a horrible feeling not to and I wouldn't wish it on anyone! I wish I'd always have happy days about it (cause I do) but its hard, it just doesn't seem fair:/
    I do honestly think I'll be okay. Will she? Who knows! The build up is what's making me go crazy.

    She's hard to talk to like that, unfortunately. She's in her almost late 70s, from a sort of pre-war Britain era and does not really communicate her feelings all that much or all that well. She's taken me in like a sort of daughter and I have filled in some of that hole a bit but if I hear, "Hope it's healthy but also hope it's a girl." one more time... ! But, then, naturally, I'd love a girl! So maybe I'm just as bad?!

    I'll just be glad when Wednesday night scan is done and over and I know and I can start moving on beyond this part of unknowingness and can put a name to this precious little one and get ready for the end of May.
    2010 - 1 DS
    2012 - Tried for a DD , and it worked!
    2013 - DD
    2017 - DD - didn't sway***


  6. #4796
    And I also wish I could take away everyone's sad feelings. It makes me so sad reading and I wish I could say more, that's why a lot of times I don't say anything at all... because I don't know what to say.

    2010 - 1 DS
    2012 - Tried for a DD , and it worked!
    2013 - DD
    2017 - DD - didn't sway***


  7. #4797
    Dream Vet
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    Threemen&alady - your kids are beautiful!!!! What a stunning picture, love it! x

    Surgena, I totally understand your nerves hun, I'll be the same I know it. I already look at the boy & girl nubs now so imagine what Id be like the days before.. ugh I'll need you ladies to internet slap me lol Dont worry about your MIL she'll get over it, it's probably anticipation nerves for her too and once she knows Im sure she'll be happy for you, and if not well let that be her issue not yours. 2 boys are great if thats what happens (although Im sure you have a pinky) and for the record both my 2 were good kids with sleep etc so dont be afraid of that (i have to be honest though, Im already thinking if this one is a girl I bet I have a terror lol!!! I had it way to easy with my boys lol) Good Luck for tomorrrow hon x
    2006 (5) (3) & cautiously expecting a beautiful baby in May

    Baby Annabelle Clare arrived safely into the world 10th May 2013 - Let the fun begin!!

  8. #4798
    It's on Wednesday - so I've got tomorrow to get through and Wednesday at work, then after work I'm heading to the scan. Oooof! Husband is leaving work early and meeting me part way there because it's in another city.
    2010 - 1 DS
    2012 - Tried for a DD , and it worked!
    2013 - DD
    2017 - DD - didn't sway***


  9. #4799
    A sort-of like cousin (it's my uncle's nephew's wife - my aunt is the one I'm related to) is two months ahead of me and she's having her second boy, and I'll be seeing her when I get to the US. So if it's a boy, I'll be in good company, I think... which I find a nice comforting feeling, really!
    2010 - 1 DS
    2012 - Tried for a DD , and it worked!
    2013 - DD
    2017 - DD - didn't sway***


  10. #4800
    I was like mummypink. Number two I wanted a girl to my worry about being able to have one but it wasn't a big deal. I was actually excited for Ds to have a brother. But with number 3 I was very nervous
    Mommy to DS1 (3) DS2 (1 1/2) angel baby DD lost at 20 weeks (5/12) and another angel baby DD at 17 weeks due to ??? (12/12)

    Next option will be HT eventually...

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