New here-questions and thanks for your help-so sick of swaying

[discouraged]

Hello,
I have been a "lurker" for some time, but finally got around to posting. I have a DS, 20 months, who I swayed unsuccessfully for. I was devastated when I found out his gender, but now I couldn't care less, he is so wonderful, but I would still like to have a dd and think this will be my last. I also had a missed miscarriage at 12 weeks in early December and felt like that was a girl and will always wonder and resent the miscarriage if I have another boy. It was shocking (found out at the ultrasound) and a real blow because I wanted my kids close together and knew I'd have to go back on the ttc girl diet which I find exceedingly difficult, especially with my schedule since I am a flight attendant, often way for 2-3 days at a time, so can't do timing, and can't always bring/choose my own food. Both times I got pregnant, it happened the first month, but now I have been trying since the mc (I didn't wait at all, just wanted to jump back in and replace what I lost) and still nothing. My cycles are long and irregular (I o anywhere from day 22-35) so timing is almost impossible to predict and not getting pregnant sucks because I have to wait longer than average for the next attempt. I am so sick of the diet (since December) that I cheat EXCESSIVELY during the 2ww, but don't want to restaart and wait another 6 weeks so will start again today (CD1) and be super strict. The supplements and refresh are getting EXPENSIVE though and it's hard to justify because it may not even work and all be a waste or time and money,.
I have some questions
-I drink 1-2 coffees a day and need this. I work a lot of 4 am starts for 12 hour days and get a headache without it, and is the only way I can skip breakfast. Will this ruin my sway ? What about diet coke?
Should I cut out the lime and just do refresh since I am ot getting pregnant which is unusual for me? Is the lime killing the sperm?\ Should I skip the sudafed too? I'm taking cranberry, acidophiliyus, vitamin c (I cut out cal/mag because it is alkaline and loading my diet with them-cal/mag didn't make a difference when I conceived my ds.
Seeing as how I am away and can't do fr, and may not be around during o (I can't predict o, unfortunately), what should I do about bd?
Are there any foods highin magnesium and calcium but low in potassium and sodium? What foods are high in magnesium? Most seem to have lots of potassium too, I was thiking about adding lots of kale and sesame seeds.... I already consume pretty much only rice cakes, rice, crystla light, peppermint tea with equal, low sodium swiss cheese (65 mg), low sodium triscuits, strawberries and cranberries. I feel like I need to add fruits and veg though,,,,I have barely had any since December and have been poisining my body with aspartame. what can I add?
What foods should I AVOID? I tried ingender last time but it was way too strict for my lifestyle- I can't buy all those foods in airports...
What else can I do?
Out of the 14 close friends and family members who have given birth in hte past 3 years , only 1 beside me has a boy. None of them did anything special, and most drink coffee, alchohol and no milk, some are overweight and don't take supplements. I don't get it!!
Thanks for any help and insight you can give me( At this point I just want a healthy baby and sibiling for my son, but everytime a friend has another girl it makes me mad and resentful.

[discouraged]

P.S.
I bought universal test strips on ebay but they don't seem to change colour even after waiting for 15 minutes with cm on them.....it says to wait 15 mins but not to let them dry, wouldn't they be dry in 15 mins? I have no idea what my ph is or how to test it properly.

[Shenanigans]

I'm not sure about everything but I would personally drop the lime juice. That will make it almost impossible to get pregnant as it kills all the sperm.