A place for those who swayed for a boy but are having or had a GIRL *Support Thread*

[gizmo77]

Thanks!! Sometimes i do belive that god has given me 5 girls but for what reason andnpurpose is what i want to kno!? Then sometimes i believe its just a fifty fifty chance of being a boy or girl!! Some of my family says ghe same yhing but then others say go for the boy. But im going to do wat feels best for me! Well good luck and i hope ur sway works! What r u doing for ur sway if u dont mind me aski.g? Im new and trying to get a good sway going before january!!

carbs + protein at every meal, eating about every 2- hrs. lots of potassium, salt, BSD af-o, and weight training. im in 2ww so if i get bfp, illpost my sway. its very similar i think to what most ppl are doing here.

[atomic sagebrush]

i feel exactly like youguys, if i dont have a son, im unsuccessful, weak. or my husband isnt man enough.
I also feel like God has plans and has planned all this. with my stomach problems lately, so close to attempt, ive been telling my dh that maybe its Gods way of telling me im not meant for a son and/or this surely isnt the way to do it.

in the end, i hope im happy.

I hope nobody EVER feels like that! It's just not true and if it ever was true, that is a world that no longer exists and I am SO glad to see it go.

There is another scientific theory out there that complements the TW stuff and it is called "the Priviledged Daughter" theory...basically if your body "thinks" your daughter will be socially dominant, strong, and successful, you are more likely to conceive one.

[atomic sagebrush]

I will be a bit sad and disappointed for sure but I don't think I will feel how I did the 3rd time around *fingers crossed*. Gosh, I felt awful, so bad I remember thinking and saying things I won't even repeat here because I am so ashamed of myself.

I keep bringing myself and hubby back to reality but saying things such as "If this sway doesn't work, it is one determined girl"... and he laughs along with me.. things like that.

For some reason, a lot of people find that number 2 and/or 3 are harder than the subsequent kids. It's like something shifts and you just make your peace with it and go on from there. So even if you have extreme GD (which I practically did with DS 3) you can get past it and go onto have a change of heart and even welcome another of the same gender.

[begonia]

I hope nobody EVER feels like that! It's just not true and if it ever was true, that is a world that no longer exists and I am SO glad to see it go.

There is another scientific theory out there that complements the TW stuff and it is called "the Priviledged Daughter" theory...basically if your body "thinks" your daughter will be socially dominant, strong, and successful, you are more likely to conceive one.

I keep reminding myself of that privileged daughter thing whenever I feel particularly low about it. The fact is our girls are certainly kicking off life with circumstances that should allow them to be just that ... dominant, confident, successful women. Granted there's a lot to go between birth and adulthood to get them there, but the odds are in their favor that they will be women to be reckoned with

And I appreciate the reply TTC5 and Atomic re: GD as you have more and more of the same gender. I grieved much quicker with DD2 than I have with this one; I think part of it is this one I really, really believed was going to be our son, not just for the sway, but also because my whole life I've thought I'd have a son. But like I said in another post, that wasn't a crystal ball showing me my future. It was just a hope. And I've come a long way in letting that go, what I struggle with more now is just the reality of never having a son. I do think I'd run into that again if we TTC#4 eventually, and until I can get to a place where I genuinely want four kids and NOT just a son ... we shouldn't TTC. If we want 4 but only if it's a boy, then we will probably adopt.

Another thing I also am still struggling with is the whole fertility thing, because darn it we have never had to TTC, other than just BD unprotected. And bam we make a baby. Where I struggle with that is it has made me feel like I/we somehow "control" when we get pregnant, and that I/we somehow should have tried a different month. But there's no going back and I can't change that. It's just one thing that I have a very hard time letting go of ... in a weird way I wish it had taken us a couple of tries, or been an accident, so I at least could've felt like it was luck, not something I actually planned. But then I keep reminding myself that this child (in my mind, at least) was meant to be ours, I do think she was planned by God long before I "planned" her, so ... it doesn't really matter when we TTC. We would have still ended up with her, and I'm completely sure we'll adore her and she'll bring something super special to our family that we need.

But darn it all, I feel like throwing a 2 year old style tantrum about not getting what I wanted, LOL. I'm having a hard time with again this evening bc DH said something today about hoping for a boy, and while I know he'll be happy having DD3, can't deny the many would have loved the chance to be a dad to a son. And I so badly wanted him to have that

[TTC5]

Big hugs B.. gosh I wish he knew so you could grieve with him. Seeing him hold hope must be killing you, you are so much stronger than me!!

[love being a mummy]

For some reason, a lot of people find that number 2 and/or 3 are harder than the subsequent kids. It's like something shifts and you just make your peace with it and go on from there. So even if you have extreme GD (which I practically did with DS 3) you can get past it and go onto have a change of heart and even welcome another of the same gender.

I agree with this.
I have G B G G G. When I found out #4 was a girl I was very upset and disappointed, and when I found out #5 was a girl I was upset but I accepted it more.
But I've never swayed before.
I'm worried if I do sway and still get a girl I might blame myself for not swaying good enough.

[begonia]

For some reason, a lot of people find that number 2 and/or 3 are harder than the subsequent kids. It's like something shifts and you just make your peace with it and go on from there. So even if you have extreme GD (which I practically did with DS 3) you can get past it and go onto have a change of heart and even welcome another of the same gender.

Oh how I hope this is me. I wonder though did you ever want boys to begin with? Because I never even would have picked ONE girl and now I will have 3, and I don't know how to get over that. Today I am so miserable about having 3 daughters that I could barely breathe at one point. I took my girls to a H'ween party and saw a family with 3 girls and it almost made me physically sick and I am sure most people thought they were precious (and they were), all dressed alike, but I couldn't stand the thought that that will be MY family makeup. Today, I regret getting pregnant at all. Today I wish I had just been happy with 2 kids and not ever wanted a third; I was OK with 2 girls. Three girls? It has made me sometimes even look at the 2 daughters I have, who I couldn't possibly love more than I do, with a detachment that I can't understand. Today I honestly have a hard time understanding why some people even want ONE girl. Today I'm REALLY mad at God...today is definitely one of my worst GD days ever, it has been since the moment I got up, and I don't know why.

But I keep telling myself I can get through today and it'll get better. This won't last forever. But TODAY has just flat out sucked. I wish I hadn't of swayed because for me, it really got my hopes up ... I knew it wasn't near 100% but I wanted to believe so badly that I would have a son that I DID believe it. And that has made this all the harder to bear.

I kinda think as much as I want to see so many people here through their TTC and pregnancies I just need to quit coming. I keep thinking that but it has been hard to commit because I do feel so connected and supported and encouraged here, but also ... it's just HARD to come here and see other people who still have a shot at their dream, and mine's OVER. Today is a bad day but I've had so many good ones that I know it'll be OK in the long run. All the best to everyone

[DoulaMama]

I am so sorry B Know that we are thinking about you and sending GD healing vibes to you, Hun. lots of love during this hard time. Do what you need to do~ xoxo

[TTC5]

Wish I could reach through and give you a real hug, B.
You will survive this and come out the other end just fine, I promise. For now, take each day as it comes and if that means crying to the heavens and back and feeling angry so be it. Your allowed to!

[Plum3]

You brought tears to my eyes B. I hope that your pain will ease and each day will get better. Thinking of you xx