Girl Sway BD frequency: Should I fit in one more attempt?

[Tmolly]

Hello ladies,
Sorry this is so long, I'm having second thoughts about how my sway worked out this month and would love some input. My "abstain + 1 attempt at pos OPK" plan was foiled when I had symptoms of ovulation nearly a week before expected. So here is a rundown of what I did. Considering my other sway factors (listed below), do you think I have a real chance of getting/being pregnant? Should I make one more attempt tonight?

CD10: Used 1 applicator of Rephresh
CD12&13: Neg. OPKs, but had EWCM with faint streaks of blood in it
CD14: Used 1 applicator of Rephresh, 13 hrs later DTD (nervous that I missed O)
CD17: Used 1 applicator of Rephresh, 14 hrs later DTD
CD20: Used 1 applicator of Rephresh, Pos OPK that evening, DTD (13 hrs after Rephresh)
CD22: Today (Oct 22nd)

So basically, I always DTD 13-14 hours after using Rephresh. If my pos OPK on CD20 is right, then tonight will be 48 hrs since pos OPK. Should I even bother with one more attempt at this point, to seal the deal, so to say? I'm nervous that my attempts were always on days that I used Rephresh, which gave me *TMI alert* CM the exact consistency of rubber glue mixed with Elmer's paste. Worried that this sticky CM could have clogged up my cervix and not been conducive to DH's swimmers. Also worried that I can't trust my generic OPKs from Amazon -- sometimes they were so close to positive, so I'm not 100% certain that the pos OPK on CD20 was really the first. Last month's pos OPK was on CD19, though.

Other sway factors: LE diet for 6 wks (w/ no breakfast, 2-3 servings of aspartame a day), Only taking Folic Acid, Still breastfeeding a toddler, Have had a horrible cold for over 2 wks now. DH is 34 and taking Cal-Mag, and Licorice Root AF-O of this and last cycle, abstained for 5 days before our first attempt and then basically released every other day or so. He didn't diet with me, but we're both vegan-leaning vegetarians anyhow. Took hot showers before our attempts, and J&D 5 minutes or longer afterwards.

If we fit in one more attempt, I figured I'd have DH do a hurry-up CFR (release when he gets home from work, then DTD as soon as he can afterwards). Just not sure if it's too late at this point or if it sways blue by having made too many attempts.

What do you all think? I really really want to be pregnant this month, but can't decide if a BFN in 2 weeks would be more disappointing than hearing, "It's a Boy!" in 5 months. Of course, even perfect sways yield opposites, but I want to be able to tell myself that I did whatever I could without compromising too much. Anyone been in a similar situation? Thank you so much for reading all this.

**EDIT**
Ugh! And to complicate things further, I just got the STRONGEST positive OPK I've ever seen (see photo below). Should I count this as my peak LH surge and disregard the others?? Not sure what to do at this point.

image.jpg

**UPDATE**
Well... I DTD again. After going crazy reading around these boards, I decided that I could be one of those women whose body prepares to ovulate and then delays for some reason or other. Especially since I'm still breastfeeding and have felt horribly sick, I just don't know what my body is up to and would hate to miss this month altogether. It's been 2.5 days since my last Rephresh application, so maybe it's still working to maintain a good ph, but not so thick as to kill everything off. We DTD with me on top and I literally jumped off DH one second after he released, running to the bathroom to J&D. Was trying to minimize sperm quantity there since he didn't have the time or energy for hurry-up CFR.

I'm not sure how I feel about this attempt, I'm worried that I'll regret it. Also worried that I'll get another pos OPK in a day or two and start second-/triple-guessing myself all over again. Can somebody confiscate these unused pee sticks before I go insane?!? What was the swaying advice for obsessive-types again? Ugh, I know this isn't good for T-levels. If anyone has some feedback or some pink dust to send my way, it would be much appreciated!!

[Pinkone]

Shame, its hard not to stress I understand! As far as I can see, your real positive was on CD 22, the difference in colours may just be different tests, but looking at the OPKs you surged at some point on CD 22, so you did the right thing by BD on CD22. I'm not sure whether the spermies would've made it with the refresh from CD 20 so I think you are fine. Good luck!

[Tmolly]

Thank you, Pinkone. It is hard to not obsess, but I'm trying to make peace with my sway as it is. I had another strong pos OPK this morning (with another brand of OPK that uses FMU), so I'm hoping this is indeed the "real"'surge before ovulation and that my attempt last night was enough. So the wait begins...

I'm so glad I have this forum to turn to for support and as a sounding board. Even my closest friends look at me like I have three heads when I've brought up swaying, so this group is really invaluable to me.

[Pinkone]

Even with another strong surge in the morning, your attempt will be close enough. Plenty of ladies have got pregnant 2 - 3 days before O. I got my first positive regular and smiley OPK at 8pm, the whole following day I got positives on both regular and digital. The next day they were both negative. DTD an hour after first positive OPK. Also did jump and dump after 5 minutes. And I'm pregnant! Good luck x

[atomic sagebrush]

These are the types of things where I really think YOU need to be the one to make up your mind anyway, I just can't say what to do without my crystal ball which is perpetually in need of repair. Sending you a ton of pink dust.

My concern is that the type of mental energy involved in obsessing about it to this level, surely can't be good for a pink sway, IKYKWIM. It almost certainly sways a heck of a lot harder than the arbitrary differences between all the miniscule details you go over in this post. So if it's BFN this month, make yourself a promise that you just aren't going to "go here" again - if you want to know whether or not to do another attempt, flip a coin. I can't tell you what to do, no one else can either, and it may be hurting your sway to focus on it so intensely. http://genderdreaming.com/forum/gend...ypothesis.html

[Tmolly]

Even with another strong surge in the morning, your attempt will be close enough. Plenty of ladies have got pregnant 2 - 3 days before O. I got my first positive regular and smiley OPK at 8pm, the whole following day I got positives on both regular and digital. The next day they were both negative. DTD an hour after first positive OPK. Also did jump and dump after 5 minutes. And I'm pregnant! Good luck x

Thanks Pinkone, that's encouraging! Good luck with your pregnancy, hope you hear pink! :-)

[Tmolly]

These are the types of things where I really think YOU need to be the one to make up your mind anyway, I just can't say what to do without my crystal ball which is perpetually in need of repair. Sending you a ton of pink dust.

My concern is that the type of mental energy involved in obsessing about it to this level, surely can't be good for a pink sway, IKYKWIM. It almost certainly sways a heck of a lot harder than the arbitrary differences between all the miniscule details you go over in this post. So if it's BFN this month, make yourself a promise that you just aren't going to "go here" again - if you want to know whether or not to do another attempt, flip a coin. I can't tell you what to do, no one else can either, and it may be hurting your sway to focus on it so intensely. http://genderdreaming.com/forum/gend...ypothesis.html

Thank you, Atomic. I just read all your essays in the link provided and wow, what an impressive undertaking!! I avoided reading these essays until now because I think I knew deep down that the findings would be bleak for me and indeed, they are. Now I know why I always hated Ferris Bueller's Day Off, even though it's supposed to be a generational favorite. Similarly, Les Misérables: I went on such a tirade after seeing the Broadway show. Despite the great songs and showmanship, I couldn't understand why anyone would root for Cosette, floating through life, while everyone around her is struggling, suffering and DYING as they help her out, unbeknownst to her. It made me SO MAD!!

So basically, I just have to "chill out," right? Without some serious CBT or mood-altering drugs, I just don't know how I'll do that, lol. Of course, I want to (typical self-loathing Jeannie-type that I am). **sigh** Well, for this cycle, what's done is done. If I get a BFN in two weeks, I'll try to remind myself (repeatedly) to not obsess as much next cycle. It just seems so unfair, that the obsessive nature of some people is exactly what stops them from getting what they want, while easygoing folks luck out. And so my martyr worldview continues.

Thank you so much for the pink dust. In the grand scheme of things, I'm grateful for my healthy beautiful son and all our blessings, even though I have my neurotic OCD moments. ;-P

[atomic sagebrush]

Well, the tricky thing is that the key is not sitting around biting your fingernails to the quick thinking "I gotta chill out or I will NEVER get my daughter!"

I think a good first step is that you can acknowledge, this is who I am, that isn't going to change, but what I can control is that when I feel the obsession coming on over things that almost certianly don't matter, and that most of which I can't control anyway, I'm going to do something ELSE for awhile. It doesn't need to be anything that "counts" LOL. Get out of the house, take your son to the park, watch a Lifetime movie, read a romance novel, anything to take your mind off what you're obsessing over.

What is not going to help is documenting your sway in this level of detail...please understand that I'm not faulting you or trying to be critical in any way because that eye for detail and ability to put it all together, is totally admirable and would translate well to a host of other things but it's just not required or in fact, good for a pink sway. You don't need to know how many hours before BD you used RepHresh, or have the array of pee sticks, etc. Let those things go as much as it's possible for you to do so - even if it's just a small amount it's still a victory, so don't beat yourself up for the things you can't let go of, celebrate the freedom of the things you can.

You're not going to be able to make yourself turn into a different person and nor should you, we like you the way you are! But what you can do is just choose not to indulge it to quite such an extent.

[The Anchor]

OMG! You've got to chill out girl! If it helps, you O about 12 - 36 hours after first +OPK, and I think you O'd on CD 22. So I'm with Pinkone...close enough! GL!

[Tmolly]

Thanks, ladies! DH knows I've been obsessing, so he's watching our son so I can take a long, hot shower and just relax -- I'll try to make this a regular occurrence.