moving on from swaying - needing encouragement

[pinkfairydust]

Hi all

I'm 35yo with one child (a boy). I suffered severe GD with him and it ruined pregnancy, birth and the first months of his life. I had it in my head i would sway for a girl with my next child. I purchased a personalised plan from atomic and got on with it. With my son i got pg first month of trying with no fuss. This is now the eighth month of TTC a second child. I slowly dropped many of the sway tactics and have now dropped them all. My priority now is to give my son a sibling and I have no concern for gender. I'm so scared that i've ruined my chances of having a child (want to make it clear - I'm not blaming this site or atomic or anything like that for any of this). Can I have any words of encouragement - is there likely to be something wrong with me after 7 months of BFN or has anyone else got experience of it happening straight away first time and then just taking a bit longer the second time?

I seem to have a fairly short luteral phase. I usually ovulate around day 15/16 but then begin spotting around day 25 and AF kicks in at day 29/day 1. Anyone else had a similar issue and still got pregnant?

If there's any positive to all this its just that it has given me a totally new perspective. I am beyond blessed with my son and my longing for a sibling is so much stronger than any longing i'd ever had for a girl.

[ksmom]

I'm so sorry this hasn't been an easy road for you. I can tell you that it can take normal healthy couples up to a year to conceive. It took nearly a year to conceive DS1 yet I've had no trouble conceiving since then although by the time we decided to have #3, I couldn't stay pregnant. It's strange how that works. Have you talked with your doctor yet? Maybe it's time to try clomid or femara if you haven't already. Your luteal phase sounds perfectly fine to me (13-14 days) and some of us (like myself) spot before actually getting AF. I think it's great that despite all this, you still want to give your DS a sibling. I hope you're able to do just that. Lots of baby dust to you!

[Suliah]

It took me 7 months to get my second (after only 2 months to get my first).

The third snuck in there even before ppaf...

Sometimes it just takes longer.

[Jeanette]

Yes, my first pregnancy I concieved first month trying and this time it took five months. It will happen for you!!!

[pinkfairydust]

I'm so sorry this hasn't been an easy road for you. I can tell you that it can take normal healthy couples up to a year to conceive. It took nearly a year to conceive DS1 yet I've had no trouble conceiving since then although by the time we decided to have #3, I couldn't stay pregnant. It's strange how that works. Have you talked with your doctor yet? Maybe it's time to try clomid or femara if you haven't already. Your luteal phase sounds perfectly fine to me (13-14 days) and some of us (like myself) spot before actually getting AF. I think it's great that despite all this, you still want to give your DS a sibling. I hope you're able to do just that. Lots of baby dust to you!

KSMOM so are you saying you spot for a few days too before your AF properly arrives and you dont count the spotting as your AF and therefore consider your cycle normal and are able to conceive with it?

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply all of you its giving me so much hope. I'm so sorry for your losses Ksmom

thank you everyone, i appreciate it so much. And thank you atomic for all your help over the past 7 months xx

[SoFullofHope]

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[atomic sagebrush]

It happens all the time, there are tons of people on here who conceived 1 or more children easily and then it took a little longer with the next conception.

[atomic sagebrush]

KSMOM so are you saying you spot for a few days too before your AF properly arrives and you dont count the spotting as your AF and therefore consider your cycle normal and are able to conceive with it?

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply all of you its giving me so much hope. I'm so sorry for your losses Ksmom

thank you everyone, i appreciate it so much. And thank you atomic for all your help over the past 7 months xx

Spotting is not AF. and even if your true AF did start that day a 10 day LP is plenty to conceive with. Please don't stress about that any more, it is not anything to worry about.

[ksmom]

KSMOM so are you saying you spot for a few days too before your AF properly arrives and you dont count the spotting as your AF and therefore consider your cycle normal and are able to conceive with it?

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply all of you its giving me so much hope. I'm so sorry for your losses Ksmom

thank you everyone, i appreciate it so much. And thank you atomic for all your help over the past 7 months xx

Yes I usually spot pink for a day or two before AF starts. It's normal and usually due to a drop in hormones in preparation for a new cycle starting. Like Atomic said, it's nothing to worry about.

[DesiG]

Hi all

I'm 35yo with one child (a boy). I suffered severe GD with him and it ruined pregnancy, birth and the first months of his life. I had it in my head i would sway for a girl with my next child. I purchased a personalised plan from atomic and got on with it. With my son i got pg first month of trying with no fuss. This is now the eighth month of TTC a second child. I slowly dropped many of the sway tactics and have now dropped them all. My priority now is to give my son a sibling and I have no concern for gender. I'm so scared that i've ruined my chances of having a child (want to make it clear - I'm not blaming this site or atomic or anything like that for any of this). Can I have any words of encouragement - is there likely to be something wrong with me after 7 months of BFN or has anyone else got experience of it happening straight away first time and then just taking a bit longer the second time?

I seem to have a fairly short luteral phase. I usually ovulate around day 15/16 but then begin spotting around day 25 and AF kicks in at day 29/day 1. Anyone else had a similar issue and still got pregnant?

If there's any positive to all this its just that it has given me a totally new perspective. I am beyond blessed with my son and my longing for a sibling is so much stronger than any longing i'd ever had for a girl.

Hello I so know how you feel I have 4 daughters and with each one of them my husband and I tried one time and was pregnant first month. We have been swaying for a boy going on 2 years it took me 6 months to get pregnant then lost baby at 10 weeks tried again and took 2 months, but that ended in a CP. I've now just wanted to give up most of my swaying, because I am so sick of having mc, but I also really want a son, but it seems like swaying just not work for my body.