What next?

[Rabbitmama85]

With this latest CD1, and the 2-3 month break we are about to do (november/december is always incredibly stressful, I cannot imagine adding to it with a birth and then birthday party planning) - we are about to hit a year ttc.

DH had an analysis done, which came back normal...so whatever it is, it's me. I have 2 months to do something, anything, to get this body back to working right. Other than the things I have already been doing (which admittedly is pretty much everything in my power), what should I be doing?

Someone suggested getting my thyroid checked. Another suggested a specific blood test for checking hormones on CD 2-3 (well, ob office is close today, so I guess it will have to wait until next month).

I've gone around all the emotions. My two closest friends are halfway through their pregnancies, when they both started ttc months after I started trying, I'm barely talking to them anymore...it just really hurts and I can't fake being excited when it's breaking me apart inside. They included me for their gender reveals, it also feels like I've been invited to more baby showers this year than I have in the last 6 years combined. I've kind of hit a level of what I would say is probably true depression. And I'm all out of momentum and whatever for continuing to try. This last month, we "only" got 3 attempts in. When we start back up, I will have 1-2 months to succeed before I become labeled as "advanced maternal age", which I never wanted to be. I'm just really bummed.

[atomic sagebrush]

Please don't overthink the "advanced maternal age" idea. It doesn't work the way they make it sound. You are going to be no different then, than you are now. It is just the age across the entire population that risks start to go up but it says nothing about YOU as an individual and these risks are gradually increasing for all of us starting back when we're in our mother's womb (seriously, half our eggs are gone before we are even born!)

i do think it's a great idea to get in and get some testing done, I'd toss in an autoimmune test in addition to thyroid and the standard blood tests. But overall (and I HATE IT when people use this as an excuse for people not getting pregnant, but it may make a difference in this case) you have just been putting SO MUCH pressure on yourself, Rabbit. What our bodies do is pick a time to get pregnant when things feel ok, and while "stress" is basically an umbrella term docs use when they don't know the answer, it can really have an effect. If your body "thinks" that you're fighting for your very survival because you're so tense about getting a sway right, it may not be functioning optimally in the fertility department. I think it's great you guys have a break coming up but once the break is over, I do not want you to put so much pressure on yourself. AMA-schma-M-A LOL. I got healthy boys at 37 and 39 (one of which I wasn't swaying at all and the other I was swaying PINK!)

This is totally doable. You have gotten pregnant before and you will get pregnant again. So we're going to get the tests done that we need to get done and then I want to you enjoy your break, don't worry about swaying, just try to keep the faith that this will happen in its own time and then single out the sway tactics that make you the most stressed/bummed and let me know what they are, and we'll figure out what to let go, what to tweak, and what to change up to make this a sway that you can live with without putting so much pressure on yourself.