We have been having a lot of questions on this topic lately so even though this info is in some other essays, I wanted to get it all into one heading to clarify for people.
Abstaining and frequent release are BD strategies we can use to lower our husband’s sperm count. Low sperm count sways pink. Contrary to what you may have read, it’s not true that X’s live longer than Y’s do – they both live the same amount of time and die off at equal rates, but for some reason that we don’t really understand, lower sperm numbers seem to sway for a girl somehow (even though there are still roughly equal numbers of both X and Y being ejaculated).
:celebrate: Abstaining – Your husband should abstain (and that means NO “helping himself”!!) for 7-10 days before your attempt. Some people abstain even longer, from AF through their attempt. For some guys, this may lower his sperm count TOO much, so if you’re abstaining you may want to go easier on other swaying techniques, like douching, jellies and spermicide, jump and dump, and long cutoffs. Even antihistamine to dry up CM may be too much if your husband has abstained for a long period of time. (you need CM on hand to ensure that some sperm are able to survive to make it to the egg)
You can use JUST abstaining as a sway technique – there is no law that says you have to douche or use Acijel or timing or any of it. Diet + abstain is still a fine sway and may be less stressful and not raise testosterone, so if you tend to be an obsessive-type, it may be something to really consider.
If your husband is over 35 or has fertility issues, you may not want to use the abstain technique because it will really lower his count by a lot, and there has been a slight increase in birth defects in babies from guys who had abstained for a long time.
If something goes wrong (such as, a nocturnal emission) it is possible to have your husband start to release 2 times a day to lower sperm count more quickly and you can still salvage the month. However, this is unreliable so you might want to use some additional sway techniques to ensure that sperm count is low.
:celebrate: Frequent release – DH needs to ejaculate every day for 7-10 days and pref. from AF-your attempt, either through masturbation or DTD with a condom (you may even want to use a spermicidal condom – these have very little spermicide and so you can still get pg after using them, but some may be left behind and the chemicals may help your sway in some way). His testosterone will go up less if he masturbates instead of DTD, but then again most guys prefer DTD and there’s something to be said for spicing up boring swaying sex a little!!
Frequent release may be difficult for some guys to manage. Sex every day sounds great but it gets old very quick. If your DH is older, it might be too much for him (esp. if he is taking licorice to lower his testosterone). This is another advantage of DTD on occasion with a condom, it helps make it less monotonous. As I mentioned above, it may be a good idea to DTD with a spermicide condom for a few days prior to your attempt – the spermicide is a very small amount and will not keep you from getting pregnant, but the chemicals may sway pink slightly.
Conversely, if he is young or is just a supersperm producer, frequent release can almost seem to encourage the swimmers!! If you try for frequent release, you CANNOT skip even one day or the sperm have a chance to recover.
If something does go wrong and you end up missing a day, it is possible to have DH start releasing twice to lower sperm count more quickly, so you can still salvage the month. However this is unreliable and so you will also want to use some other swaying techniques to ensure that the sperm count is lowered.
:celebrate:Abstaining with a cutoff – This is just abstaining and then having one attempt 2-3 days prior to ovulation. It’s probably best not to go overboard with other swaying techniques because the abstaining will already be swaying by a good bit.
:celebrate: Abstaining with O+12 – Exactly as described, this is abstaining and then having one attempt 12 hours after ovulation.
:celebrate:Frequent release with a cutoff – Frequent release with one attempt 2-3 days before ovulation. Note – you must do frequent release for 7-10 days before your ATTEMPT, not ovulation.
:celebrate:Frequent release with O+12 – DH releases at least once a day for 7-10 days, with one attempt 12 hours after ovulation.
:celebrate: Frequent BD with a cutoff OR through O – Another strategy some people have used as part of a pink sway, is a variation of frequent release. You actually BD every day at least once, from AF-O (and you can’t fudge it on this, you have to start at the beginning of AF in order to allow 7-10 days of BD prior to the earliest point you might be fertile) either leading up to a cutoff, or straight through O.
If you do decide to BD through O, you will probably want to use some additional sway techniques like antihistamines, spermicides, and/or jellies to counteract the additional EWCM that many women get around ovulation. Also, frequent BD may raise pH so if low pH is very important to you, you’ll want to monitor the situation and adjust your pH using one of the jellies.
:celebrate:Mixing cutoff and O+12 – This is only slightly more complicated and may increase your chances of a BFP. First, abstain from AF-a cutoff attempt 2-3 days before O. Then, have your husband release 2 times a day (without exception! Once a day is not enough!) and then try for a second attempt at O+12. If you decide to go this route, it’s better NOT to DTD for release, because it may raise your pH and it also may kill off some sperm that are waiting in the cervical crypts. Release via masturbation only.
:celebrate: The Valley of Frequent Release:
If your husband really CAN’T do either abstinence or frequent release (and some guys just can’t manage it) then a great compromise is to have him release as much as possible for a day or two (even up to 3x a day for 2 days in a row), using only the last batch for insemination. You could also combine this strategy with an O+12 or a cutoff, or a BD through O – if you wanted to have more than one attempt, you could have DH release 3x one day before ovulation, using the last batch for insemination, and then again 3x on O day, using only the last batch for insemination. This seems to be a good compromise (but may reduce odds of pg). More info and discussion is found in this thread [url]http://genderdreaming.com/forum/showthread.php?5007-lowering-sperm-count-without-daily-BDing-or-abstaining[/url]
:celebrate: BEYOND the Valley of Frequent Release:
For men who already do frequent release (some guys have the habit of cleaning the pipes pretty much on a daily basis and are still fathering boys), it is a good idea to have him increase the frequency to 2x a day, and/or release up to 3 times on the day of the attempt, using only the last ejaculation for insemination. This may reduce odds of pregnancy somewhat. More info is in this thread [url]http://genderdreaming.com/forum/showthread.php?5007-lowering-sperm-count-without-daily-BDing-or-abstaining[/url]
:celebrate: A note about “Deanna’s Plan” (SMEP) –
[url]http://www.pregnancyloss.info/sperm_meets_egg_plan.htm[/url] Deanna’s Plan (or SMEP, Sperm Meets Egg Plan) is a pattern of BD that is designed to maximize your odds of pregnancy. Some people say Deanna’s plan sways pink, but if true, this is very likely because the people who follow Deanna’s plan are struggling with fertility (particularly low sperm count) to begin with.
If you are in a big hurry to get pregnant, Deanna’s Plan will def. increase your odds. However, if you are a fully fertile couple, it’s not going to sway pink for you and may sway blue! You should DEF. consider using other sway techniques, such as antihistamine, douches, jellies, spermicide, to counteract the higher number of sperm that your DH will both produce and that will be deposited in your reproductive tract.