HopingForSaskia's 12 week nub

Well said ipadmad and Harley.

I would also add one of the mums in my town has 3 boys 2 years apart and she's got the nicest family and those boys just love love love her. It's like she's got a footy team of her own, but they are all very different. She cried after the third ultrasound too but now wouldn't have it any other way. She's beautiful like you and has a great job. The other day she came over and said "oh I'll just stay for one drink, the boys are at home (50m away) cooking me a roast, I don't want to be late". They are 8, 10 and 12!!! They are such amazing kids and it totally relaxed me about everything.

I still want to do my best sway and I will still have a week of disappointment if I hear boy, but I am actually quite excited at having three adoring little men in our house that play together and (hopefully) love their mum as much as hers.

Take the time to process this, nobody says you have to feel good about it yet. The beauty of finding out early is you have time to accept and move on. Take the time hon, and don't feel bad for it.

Hi Hoping, I remember you from the forums my first month TTC. I was silently stalking this thread because I remember what an amazing sway you had and was so curious what the outcome would be after seeing the tricky nub shot. Thinking of you and wishing you peace and acceptance. I know your new little boy will steal your heart when you meet him. :)

I don't post much, but I've been stalking this thread for a bit. I'm so sorry that you didn't hear girl today. I remember hearing that my third was another boy. I am ashamed to say that I was disappointed and a bit in denial. But once he was born... It was an immediate bond and of course immense love. He was so beautiful. He still is. He's a complete mama's boy and I wouldn't trade him (or his brothers) for a daughter. I know you'll feel that same way, if you don't already. Congrats on your sweet little boy. Hugs.

congrats!!!

Congratulations on your healthy little baby boy. Sorry you didn't hear pink though, I was really hoping you would hear your DG.

Oh Hun sorry you didn't hear pink I remember having massive sway envy your sway was amazing! This must be a very special lill dude to make such an effort to join you xxx

Hugs. Your precious new little man is the same as my second DS, a 'meant to be-by' he is all man despite your swaying attempts and has so much to teach you and so so much love to gve you x

I'm sorry you didn't hear girl, but congrats on your beautiful healthy baby. This little boy is going to be very special and close to you. Hope you are feeling everyday better :hugs:

I am so sorry you didn't hear girl. Thinking of you. :HH:

I've been following your thread with my fingers crossed tightly that you were going to get your little girl. I'm so sorry that you didn't but congratulations on your healthy baby boy. I'm sure once he's in your arms, you couldn't imagine life without him xx

Congrats on a healthy baby boy. Sorry you didn't hear pink, you had such an awesome sway he must be pretty special to break through all that!

Thanks everyone. I'm doing better now. I have my moments of course, but that's really only because I just don't have anywhere to go from here. There are no other options available that could maybe give me my girl. I won't sway again. If we want a fourth, I'll just throw caution to the wind and not consider the gender. My dream is all but dead. It's sad, but as I said to my dear Aussie group on Facebook, I am not defined by what I possess, and the genders of my children are no different. I would hate to think I saw my babies as a thing to own or achieve. So I have had to do some really big soul searching and keep my feelings in their rightful place. I am in love with my baby no matter what. I just wish that I could know that some day I would have my little girl. I think I'm still a little in denial that this is a boy, and because of several reasons that only sound crazy I am going to have one more confirmation of gender before I start calling baby "him" or "he".. I will visit my naturopath/iridologist (a very very special man with insight that I have never seen before.. He told me both my boys were boys from 10 weeks just from looking at my eyes) and I will 100% believe whatever he tells me. Boy or not .. ;)

Thank you all again for your lovely and insightful words. It really is wonderful to have all of this support. I know I'm no one special, but you've all made me feel like I really matter. So thank you. :) :HH:

Oh you really do matter! Funnily enough I was telling my husband about the forum and how bizarre it is to find comfort in strangers and how you come to care for them and I told him about you. Hoping for Saskia who lives the other side of the world. :-)

I really think you will have your girl. Your husband is clearly very fertile so I'd just go for the one attempt next time.

I've absolutely no doubt that this little person will bring you a joy that will full your life with unimaginable happiness. In all the reasons we have in desiring a particular gender we forget that it is the sole and character of the person that's most important and actually defines who they are. Whoever you are growing is very special and whether your girl is in there now or still waiting, you will have her.

X

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Originally Posted by hopingforsaskia

Thanks everyone. I'm doing better now. I have my moments of course, but that's really only because I just don't have anywhere to go from here. There are no other options available that could maybe give me my girl. I won't sway again. If we want a fourth, I'll just throw caution to the wind and not consider the gender. My dream is all but dead. It's sad, but as I said to my dear Aussie group on Facebook, I am not defined by what I possess, and the genders of my children are no different. I would hate to think I saw my babies as a thing to own or achieve. So I have had to do some really big soul searching and keep my feelings in their rightful place. I am in love with my baby no matter what. I just wish that I could know that some day I would have my little girl. I think I'm still a little in denial that this is a boy, and because of several reasons that only sound crazy I am going to have one more confirmation of gender before I start calling baby "him" or "he".. I will visit my naturopath/iridologist (a very very special man with insight that I have never seen before.. He told me both my boys were boys from 10 weeks just from looking at my eyes) and I will 100% believe whatever he tells me. Boy or not .. ;)

Thank you all again for your lovely and insightful words. It really is wonderful to have all of this support. I know I'm no one special, but you've all made me feel like I really matter. So thank you. :) :HH:

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Wow I wish I knew you in person, you truly have words that express an incredible spirit, a wisdom, strength and a humbleness that just doesn't belong to a woman who is so clearly powerful. Thank YOU.

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Originally Posted by hopingforsaskia

Thanks everyone. I'm doing better now. I have my moments of course, but that's really only because I just don't have anywhere to go from here. There are no other options available that could maybe give me my girl. I won't sway again. If we want a fourth, I'll just throw caution to the wind and not consider the gender. My dream is all but dead. It's sad, but as I said to my dear Aussie group on Facebook, I am not defined by what I possess, and the genders of my children are no different. I would hate to think I saw my babies as a thing to own or achieve. So I have had to do some really big soul searching and keep my feelings in their rightful place. I am in love with my baby no matter what. I just wish that I could know that some day I would have my little girl. I think I'm still a little in denial that this is a boy, and because of several reasons that only sound crazy I am going to have one more confirmation of gender before I start calling baby "him" or "he".. I will visit my naturopath/iridologist (a very very special man with insight that I have never seen before.. He told me both my boys were boys from 10 weeks just from looking at my eyes) and I will 100% believe whatever he tells me. Boy or not .. ;)

Thank you all again for your lovely and insightful words. It really is wonderful to have all of this support. I know I'm no one special, but you've all made me feel like I really matter. So thank you. :) :HH:

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So well put. Keep us posted on what happens with the naturopath, I love mine too.

Was the radiologist certain? Did they come across as knowledgable or new? It's not like there has never been a mistake before. Don't want to give you false hope but a friend of mine was told boy for her dd2 and she was a girl at birth!!

I completely agree with what you said about not being defined by what we have and I too have been thinking more lately about why exactly I want a girl so much, and questioning my own motives (in a good way).

I think each child teaches us something we need to know. This time around I've been taught to wait (TTC 12 months now). My first taught me how to deal with things that aren't planned, and just about every lesson in being a hypocrite and/or parenting. My second taught me some kids are just chilled and happy no matter what you do/how you raise them.

Did you get a potty shot other than the one you posted? Because I don't see 'it' there. Did you get a DVD?

So glad to hear that you are in such a clear place. If your naturopath agrees it is a boy please start a names thread so that we can all get excited with you.

It is far too early to think of other children in this post but i wont know when you are thinking it (if you do) so will post this now. If you do decide that you are a 4 child family you could adopt a girl or go for an almost not-sway - breastfeeding, one attempt and trying to lose baby weight(if you are anything like me).

Congratulations again on your healthy baby. - just think of the gorgeous smell of his baby head! Getting broody already:)

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Originally Posted by meeks32

So well put. Keep us posted on what happens with the naturopath, I love mine too.

Was the radiologist certain? Did they come across as knowledgable or new? It's not like there has never been a mistake before. Don't want to give you false hope but a friend of mine was told boy for her dd2 and she was a girl at birth!!

Did you get a potty shot other than the one you posted? Because I don't see 'it' there. Did you get a DVD?

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I asked her if she was certain, and she said yes. She was really lovely and knew how much we wanted a girl, so I can imagine she would have really tried to be as sure as she could be.

This is the thing.. And I'm going to sound like a lunatic. Right in the beginning, she measured the femurs and there was NOTHING there in that shot. I'm no expert so it might not be something that's really visible in that procedure. But I got a little flutter in my heart. Then, twice, I saw VERY definite 3 lines. Like, I said OH MY GOD! out loud.. She seemed to think "he" had "his" hand down there grabbing at "himself" so I assumed that was the lines. Then it got me thinking though.. If the hands were down there so much, and the only proof shot is the one I posted, how can I honestly know for sure that what she saw half the time wasn't a hand? In any case, I understand that me going to the naturopath is simply going to confirm one way or the other. I'm not looking for him to disprove her gender analysis, but more to lay any doubts to rest for me so that I can start a names thread like Em suggested. ;) the facial shot she gave me to stare at and bond with (in 3d - did I post that??) is soooo pretty and the people I've shown say dumb stuff like - oh she has your lips or her nose is like yours... And then they correct themselves and say he or him. It's little things like that that really play on my doubt and I don't want to spend the rest of my pregnancy hoping this babe will pop out a girl.

I know. I'm a nutcase. ;) xx

Here's the 3d pic of the face btw:

Attachment 9929

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Originally Posted by hopingforsaskia

I asked her if she was certain, and she said yes. She was really lovely and knew how much we wanted a girl, so I can imagine she would have really tried to be as sure as she could be.

This is the thing.. And I'm going to sound like a lunatic. Right in the beginning, she measured the femurs and there was NOTHING there in that shot. I'm no expert so it might not be something that's really visible in that procedure. But I got a little flutter in my heart. Then, twice, I saw VERY definite 3 lines. Like, I said OH MY GOD! out loud.. She seemed to think "he" had "his" hand down there grabbing at "himself" so I assumed that was the lines. Then it got me thinking though.. If the hands were down there so much, and the only proof shot is the one I posted, how can I honestly know for sure that what she saw half the time wasn't a hand? In any case, I understand that me going to the naturopath is simply going to confirm one way or the other. I'm not looking for him to disprove her gender analysis, but more to lay any doubts to rest for me so that I can start a names thread like Em suggested. ;) the facial shot she gave me to stare at and bond with (in 3d - did I post that??) is soooo pretty and the people I've shown say dumb stuff like - oh she has your lips or her nose is like yours... And then they correct themselves and say he or him. It's little things like that that really play on my doubt and I don't want to spend the rest of my pregnancy hoping this babe will pop out a girl.

I know. I'm a nutcase. ;) xx

Here's the 3d pic of the face btw:

Attachment 9929

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I really hope I'm not feeding a bad thing here, but from that story I would say go get a second opinion in both your naturopath and another scan... At the very least it will bring piece. I could see the boy bits so clear with both of mine, and with ds2 I made the tech show me, but actually knew just by looking at his man legs, lol!

Or maybe do the intelligender wee test?

Maybe if my naturopath says girl I'll go get a scan while I'm visiting my parents next week. But if he says boy I'll leave it, cos he will be right and it will have the other guesses backing it up. I'm not getting my hopes up - don't worry!! ;) Just looking for a feeling of peace with the "diagnosis". :) x

Oh and like you, I told my techs both times with my boys that they were boys just watching the screen. Ds1 was so crazy obvious that I knew minutes into the scan and with ds2 they scanned the bits and asked me what I thought .. Needless to say I thought 1000% boy. So I know what I'm looking for. ;)

Im hoping you get some reassurance either way. Being in limbo and doubt makes it really hard to either deal with GD head on or to know that you got your dream gender. It cant be easy, so i pray you get a solid answer either way <3
I think you have a good plan. You dont sound like a nut at all. I would feel the same way, especially given the hands and all of that during the scan.

With my third DD, I didn't look at the u/s and had her do the envelope thing. When I opened it with obvious girl parts staring back at me, I still did not believe it since I did not see it during the scan with my own eyes.

I booked a 3D scan because I had never had one before and told DH it would be cool to do but in reality, I wanted to confirm gender so I could mentally move on. So, I totally get the denial part and I am sure your scan will help you move forward.

Yes, I really understand how if YOU didn't see it, it would be very hard to totally accept it. YOu don't sound crazy about the hand thing, either, it makes sense. Instead of ultrasound, have you thought of having that blood test done? Can that be done in australia? I don't know how expensive it is. But, it might be a good option, because if your naturopath says girl, and you get another scan that says boy... I would think you'd still feel the same way, hoping a girl will, in fact, pop out.
A blood test might feel definitive. It seems there really could be genuine doubts with these other methods.

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Originally Posted by lindi

Yes, I really understand how if YOU didn't see it, it would be very hard to totally accept it. YOu don't sound crazy about the hand thing, either, it makes sense. Instead of ultrasound, have you thought of having that blood test done? Can that be done in australia? I don't know how expensive it is. But, it might be a good option, because if your naturopath says girl, and you get another scan that says boy... I would think you'd still feel the same way, hoping a girl will, in fact, pop out.
A blood test might feel definitive. It seems there really could be genuine doubts with these other methods.

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I just had the bloods done. It's new to Australia and I was referred by the fetal medicine consultant, had to be counselled beforehand and it cost over a thousand dollars. It was a bit of a palaver, not sure if they'd recommend it just for gender.

Good idea though!

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Originally Posted by hopingforsaskia

Maybe if my naturopath says girl I'll go get a scan while I'm visiting my parents next week. But if he says boy I'll leave it, cos he will be right and it will have the other guesses backing it up. I'm not getting my hopes up - don't worry!! ;) Just looking for a feeling of peace with the "diagnosis". :) x

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Understand and completely agree with your plan. Let me know. I can't make piece with yours yet either!!

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Originally Posted by Mum to three girls

I just had the bloods done. It's new to Australia and I was referred by the fetal medicine consultant, had to be counselled beforehand and it cost over a thousand dollars. It was a bit of a palaver, not sure if they'd recommend it just for gender.

Good idea though!

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Wowsers! I have heard of the blood test but that's so much! You could have 5 ultrasounds for that price!!

You poor thing, I assume you had to have it for other reasons too, and hope all is ok.

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Originally Posted by Mum to three girls

I just had the bloods done. It's new to Australia and I was referred by the fetal medicine consultant, had to be counselled beforehand and it cost over a thousand dollars. It was a bit of a palaver, not sure if they'd recommend it just for gender.

Good idea though!

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Oh gosh!!! That's incredible! Talk about bleed you dry... Hope your LO is ok though Mum. xx

Don't think I'll go for a blood test (obviously?) ;) but I will certainly be booking a second scan. I really will believe my naturopath though. He is an amazing guy with unbelievable talent. He sees so much that he doesn't say. I would put more stock in his answer than 10 ultrasounds if I'm completely honest. :) He will probably say boy - let's face it - but that will be the confirmation I need to make peace and move forward.

I felt that my ds2 was a girl and booked a 3d scan. Even after that confirmation a part of me still thought he was a girl. So when I delivered him I still have a tiny question mark. Honestly though I was so happy to have another boy. But what is quite funny is that most people that don't know me have mistaken him for a girl. And some of my friends have even said he looks like a girl. He is so engaging and gorgeous and pretty. :-)
My point is, as I said above that its the sole and character that I think really defines the person. That being said, I won't be dressing my boys in girls clothes so there is always that...
Whatever the result I'm sure you'll be just fine. Better still really happy.
Please do keep us updated!

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Originally Posted by meeks32

Wowsers! I have heard of the blood test but that's so much! You could have 5 ultrasounds for that price!!

You poor thing, I assume you had to have it for other reasons too, and hope all is ok.

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Thanks Meeks, I'm pretty sure everything is fine (as is my ob). I just had a pregnant freak out over my blood results (my scan was fine) and wanted extra reassurance - very expensive reassurance! DH has a science background (we both do) and we had intense discussions about stats and risk before he gave in to his crazed hormonal wife.

Hoping, if I were you I'd get another scan too. You won't believe it till you see it for yourself, I know I wouldn't.

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Originally Posted by hopingforsaskia

Oh gosh!!! That's incredible! Talk about bleed you dry... Hope your LO is ok though Mum. xx

Don't think I'll go for a blood test (obviously?) ;) but I will certainly be booking a second scan. I really will believe my naturopath though. He is an amazing guy with unbelievable talent. He sees so much that he doesn't say. I would put more stock in his answer than 10 ultrasounds if I'm completely honest. :) He will probably say boy - let's face it - but that will be the confirmation I need to make peace and move forward.

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When do you see him?

I'll go on Monday. :)

I think trust what he says and go from there.

I was looking back at your nub shot again, and it does look boy when I compare to these two galleries:

CONFIRMED GIRL
Post your GIRL nub ultrasounds once confirmed :) - In-Gender.com

CONFIRMED BOY
Post your BOY nub ultrasounds once confirmed :) - In-Gender.com

Good luck on Monday. I am really surprised she didn't show you the goods during the ultrasound. That would drive me nuts, so I don't blame you for wanting more confirmation.

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Originally Posted by kaseybaby

Good luck on Monday. I am really surprised she didn't show you the goods during the ultrasound. That would drive me nuts, so I don't blame you for wanting more confirmation.

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Agree!

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Originally Posted by meeks32

I think trust what he says and go from there.

I was looking back at your nub shot again, and it does look boy when I compare to these two galleries:

CONFIRMED GIRL
Post your GIRL nub ultrasounds once confirmed :) - In-Gender.com

CONFIRMED BOY
Post your BOY nub ultrasounds once confirmed :) - In-Gender.com

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This is fine, but all it is at this juncture is speculation. Nubs aren't the be all. In fact from what I've read neither are scans before 20 weeks. I am soooo aware that this is 99.9% surely a boy. But I need that last .01% to be sure. I am never going to be able to go ht and I sure as hell won't sway again, so this is it for me. I need to do this - whether or not it's ridiculous. I know you understand that. I feel like a psycho. :o

I hope this isn't too nosy, but i am genuinely curious what an iridologist can tell you about your eyes? I haven't heard of this before.

Hoping you find the peace you are looking for. :)

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Originally Posted by harleyquinn

I hope this isn't too nosy, but i am genuinely curious what an iridologist can tell you about your eyes? I haven't heard of this before.

Hoping you find the peace you are looking for. :)

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They can see just about everything if they know what they're looking for. :) at the very least he will be able to give an insight into this baby's personality and some extra tidbits for me to help me bond.

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Originally Posted by hopingforsaskia

This is fine, but all it is at this juncture is speculation. Nubs aren't the be all. In fact from what I've read neither are scans before 20 weeks. I am soooo aware that this is 99.9% surely a boy. But I need that last .01% to be sure. I am never going to be able to go ht and I sure as hell won't sway again, so this is it for me. I need to do this - whether or not it's ridiculous. I know you understand that. I feel like a psycho. :o

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You are absolutely not not not psycho and I would feel the same way. Scratch that, I DO feel the same way FOR you. I know all indications show boy but I also believe you have had two boys and would know if you saw a doodle on the ultrasound!!! If you have doubt at all, even a bit it's worth satisfying that with further investigations, even if they end in the same result. At least then you can move forward to acceptance and move onto excitement and bonding. I would so do everything you are doing and don't at all think its strange or ridiculous.

You just need to be sure to embrace it. I get that completely.

I also don't think it is crazy!

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Originally Posted by hopingforsaskia

This is fine, but all it is at this juncture is speculation. Nubs aren't the be all. In fact from what I've read neither are scans before 20 weeks. I am soooo aware that this is 99.9% surely a boy. But I need that last .01% to be sure. I am never going to be able to go ht and I sure as hell won't sway again, so this is it for me. I need to do this - whether or not it's ridiculous. I know you understand that. I feel like a psycho. :o

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Please don't feel this is psycho. It all makes sense.