I am glad! XQuote:
Originally Posted by Burakoam
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I am glad! XQuote:
Originally Posted by Burakoam
Children's sorted for Christmas but not really anyone else, love Christmas as well! XQuote:
Originally Posted by Burakoam
So ive finally decided how to do my gender reveal over Christmas! I've ordered boy and girl scratch cards and once we find out gender on Christmas eve (*cough boy*) I shall dish the scratch cards out to our families and watch their reactions! Can't wait x I still can't believe i have kept having a gender scan a secret! I tell my family everything!
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Yes 5th baby a lady at school who i see everyday had 4 boys then a girl she constantly nagged me to try for another assuring me it would be a girl ha ha..now she's sure it will be ....i think otherwiseQuote:
Originally Posted by jdd1017
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It's official.. I have a nephew on the way :) got to watch the gender reveal over FaceTime. My heart did shake a bit wanting to shatter, but I really am beyond happy for her and them. I figured it would be a boy, per this site she is very typical boy mom material. High powered career, very driven.. I'm just glad I'm gonna have a squishy baby boy to snuggle a month after my baby is born.. I'll squish and snuggle them both at once :) :)
That sounds fun! Have you seen that video getting around Facebook the couple who did their gender reveal by opening a box and balloons came out, but they were all different colors like a rainbow. That would have been disappointing but great story to tell the kids.Quote:
Originally Posted by All*blue*everything
Thank you for what you said, Girlie. I am hurting for you. You can only feel what you feel and denying it DOES make it worse. I think time only heals if you allow yourself to feel everything and work through those feelings truthfully.
I know I will be more OK than I am now with time because I am feeling all the ugly stuff and not forcing myself too much. I say that because I keep telling myself that I couldn't handle a girl and I wouldn't be the right kind of mom for a girl and I am believing it. Not sure if that's denial or a true realization. My way is to try to make divine sense of it...like I could actually do that! Haha. I'm a pretty closed Agnostic bordering on Atheist...LOL. But, I feel something exists that is "bigger" than us. I call it the Universe.
I honestly think that the Universe didn't place a daughter in my care for a reason. One that I am trying to understand.
My biggest problem is working through jealousy of everyone who gets their hearts desire.
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I dont think its about denying your disappointment when it comes to coming to terms with an unwanted gender/baby/etc. Obviously no one will tell a single person thats healthy. Its about finding ways to heal. If you arent looking, if you expect the universe to fix itself, thats when it becomes an issue. Time doesnt heal all wounds, or PTSD wouldnt be a thing (which i have...though not from gender disappointment)
Do i think its entirely possible someone can get C-PTSD from gender disappointment? Oh yes. I think thats the most severe form of GD. I think it requires therapy, medication, just like any other individual who has C-PTSD or PTSD from any other situation. It doesnt just go away. Those who feel time healed their wounds, probably had something positive they held on to that got them through that length of time.
Girlie it was at about 20 weeks that I really started feeling kicks and jabs, down low mostly as my anterior placenta is high. Theres still plenty of room for them to swim around in before then I suppose. Ive seen ladies talk about drinking cold sugary drinks to get baby to move around more if they are worried about lack of movement. X
I'm not ready for Christmas but I'm ready for some time off!Quote:
Originally Posted by Burakoam
Although no ice or snow here... today was 36 degrees Celsius (almost 97 deg F) so a bit warmer :) it often gets to over 40 here so I'm not looking forward to that!
I suppose we just don't know what the future or the universe has planned for us, I guess that is what is exciting about life? My best friend got engaged and am just so excited, I think I must be starting to adjust? We went Christmas shopping today I needed a few parts of the children's Christmas outfits and I can't say the pink tutu for baby girls did give me a pang of sadness but it passed!Quote:
Originally Posted by Lissastick
One of my neighbours an elderly man has three grown up sons and he has six granddaughters. He had no daughters and his sons have had no sons. Funny how life works out! X
Anyone have awful skin? My skin is terrible but I never had this with previous pregnancies neither my dd or ds 1 or ds2 x
I do tend to have that girlie. We have the thyroid in common so maybe its related to that. Ive only had it with DD2 and DD4...so i dont have it every pregnancy either.
I think you will have lots of grandaughters girlie just like i will have lots of grandsons :)
I have terrible skin. I have adult acne since my mid twenties (I'm mid thirties now). Had extra horrible acne with DS1 and again, extra bad acne with DS2.
Sigh.
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Oh, I have two nieces, whom I love to death! And they look like me!!!! And my son looks a bit like my brother, who will never have a son, like I will never have a daughter.
They are girly like me too. I can't wait to show them all my beauty knowledge! Their mother is not into makeup so she's letting me step in to be the beauty guru aunt.
I am extremely lucky despite me not getting exactly what I wanted ❤
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My skin is better than with my boys but I still get some breakouts. I had about 2 weeks of clear skin which was awesome but it came back. I can't complain as with ds2 it was terrible and also cystic acne.
The only time in my life I have had good skin was when I was on the pill but I don't want to take it again as it makes me feel depressed.
My little girl will have to ask her aunt for makeup.advice when she is older as I'm not good with that. My SIL has one boy and they are apparently ttc so I'm hoping she can get pregnant to start with and that she gets a girl, alth I think she has pcos and doesn't know about swaying so she will probably get another boy.
Hey GirlieQuote:
Originally Posted by Girlieplease
I want to offer you my support. I totally relate to your feelings and i think you are very brave for saying how you feel. I know your jealousy stems from a good place, if that makes sense at all. You dont wish bad on anyone, but rather you feel hard done by - 'how life works out for everyone else' type of feeling. A perfect example, my BFF just had her 3rd child, a girl, after two boys - she didnt mind the gender at all, she just always wanted 3 children. I mean, how lucky for her? - that made me jealous because its ALL i want and she got it without even giving it a thought. I love her and her children to the ends of this earth and it doesn't make me a bad person for feeling how i felt. We are the best of friends and i cuddle her daughter as much as i can :) (AND she took vitamins, had sex two days in a row, ran twice a week for 30 minutes, 3 meals a day with after noon biscuits and tea, didnt drink alcohol and only drinks tea!) I consider her to be incredibly fortunate that she barely adjusted her lifestyle and still managed a girl.
I found no peace in what anyone told me really with DS2.. i just had to come to terms with it on my own. Talking about it helps though hun and this is the place for that! Wishing you all the best regardless xx
On a side note - I wish i could still be part of this group. I never did find out the gender of this one i lost. Im still bleeding unfortunately, going on since 26th October. Im going for a scan on Thursday. Wish me luck :)
Your best friend sounds exactly like my lifestyle there's hope for me yet lol!Quote:
Originally Posted by squigglepink
Hope your scan goes well x I know people can bleed for a long time x
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Lol, She drinks coke and is a vegetarian (eats chicken occasionally) - BUT she did same when she had her two boys. Hence i say she didn't adjust much, unless i pinpoint her changes i can honestly say the only difference noted was that she started taking vitamins & running - and that was with me - so i know how often we ran and for how long. I know when she started ttc and what meals she ate because she asked me for dinner inspiration :) I use her as an example because our lifestyle is so similar and we are such boy moms that i didnt expect her to have a girl and she wasn't fussed either way! And there you go - little effort and boom, GIRL! :)Quote:
Originally Posted by All*blue*everything
Music to my ears strangely - that you know people can bleed for a long time! My GP thinks i started my period almost 3 weeks ago - which means ive had AF for a long time.. concerning. Hope i can get sorted soon so i can try again!!
Are you finding out gender?
I don't drink coke but I am a vegetarian I think if this was a girl then I did start taking vitamins (magnesium ok, and angus castus) and was going aqua Zumba once a week apart from that nothing change ...but im sure it will be a boy we find out Christmas eve xQuote:
Originally Posted by squigglepink
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I never thought of that, it's a good point. I had an underactive thyroid with both previous boy pregnancies but it was better regulated, so could be a good explanation! XQuote:
Originally Posted by Burakoam
Thanks squigglepink, lovely that you took the time to comment. It is such an odd situation to be in but am glad others understand. Am not that brave, no one apart from dh in real life knows I swayed or the level of my gender disappointment. When I told my mum we were pregnant with this one, she asked me what I was hoping for? What the actual heck, I said a girl and she do you not think a boy would be easier? My boys are very easy laid back guy's, dd is first child and very intense, so even my own mum did not have a clue. I am sure I have a few friends that have gender disappointment but we have never spoke about it, it's sad really. So am open on here as I feel we have all come here with a belief that something else is important other than just having a healthy baby.Quote:
Originally Posted by squigglepink
Am so jealous of people who don't care what they have, like your friend, I want to be were she is at, my dh is like that!
Sorry to hear that your still bleeding, hoping that it stops soon. Are you going to ttc again? keep us posted, thanks again for your post x o
So I had some bleeding, went to the hospital, explained about the reduced movement and now bleeding, they seemed unconcerned but saw me anyway. They did not offer me a scan but said they would let me hear the heart beat with the doppler and then I could be on my way, that is how the midwife put it. Anyway, she tried and tried to find the heart beat but could not, I said to her you cannot find it and she avoided eye contact and said you need to be scanned by a consultant. She left us in the room for ages, the consultant was with someone else. He scanned us and right away baby on screen heart beating away, he said thank God. I think they were quite concerned. I have an enlarged blood vessel, which is causing the bleeding.
On a side note am glad I know the gender, the consultant did not look but I saw nothing between the legs, so at 18 weeks if I did not know I would be starting to get excited, my big scan is not until January x o
Oh that sounds like a very scary experience Girlie :( He must have been in an awkward position so the doppler didn't work. Did you have an anterior placenta? I'm very happy to hear he is all ok, hopefully the blood vessel doesn't cause too many issues.
Thank God alright, they would have been in deep poo poo if something was wrong and you had raised concerns days ago! Glad your little boy is ok in there Girlie xQuote:
Originally Posted by Girlieplease
im glad baby is okay girlie. And glad they scanned you.
I'm glad your baby is ok, Girlie.
My FB friend who is pregnant with her third baby and has two boys...
She announced and she's having a third boy. I have to say. I actually felt bad for her watching her video and the look on her face when she saw the blue ballons coming out of the box. I think she really wanted a girl.
I said I wanted her to have a boy so I wouldn't be jealous, but now I just feel extra awful.
I personally couldn't handle THREE boys. Haha.
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Aww sorry your friend didn't get a girl. I know there was no way I would have risked doing a video with a gender reveal like that for this one as if it was boy I wouldn't have been able to compose myself at all. I cried at the ultrasound place when I found out DS2 was a boy.
Don't feel bad Lissa, I think I was jealous of anyone who got a girl for a while when I was pregnant with DS2. Although mostly it was those who had boy then girl but now I think they are missing out as having two boys is very special.
... duplicate post ...
Pleasure and Thank you! I want to ttc asap. Just need to stop bleeding! Sigh...Quote:
Originally Posted by Girlieplease
My brothers wife, (they have a pigeon pair), said she would love a 3rd, but would prefer a girl. She has a very hard time with her son. This is just how life is, we have preferences, dreams and desires and although we cannot choose what we want, naturally, we come here, to sway, to try. That's the best we can do - especially if one cannot afford HT. I know i will have GD with a 3rd boy, because i had it with a 2nd boy. Even though my two are basically inseparable now - this picture wasn't clear to me then. And annoyingly, my DH is also ok with another boy. Wish i had that attitude.
I really hope that by my recent loss, i can just appreciate carrying a healthy baby full term. (if i ever stop bleeding :mad:)
Equally happy to hear you were scanned and all is ok with baby. Sending you only positive vibes and hugs for what you are going through xx
I'm so glad everything turned out okay!!!! How scary!Quote:
Originally Posted by Girlieplease
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I'm feeling baby move around every day. I'm definitely not as worried about losing him anymore.
I'm finally experiencing denial. I skipped that in my grieving process and I am making up for it now.
I keep thinking that the U/S is wrong and it might still be a girl. I did see what I thought was a penis, but I saw no scrotum!!! I saw DS1's Frank and beans as clear as day and I had the U/S at the exact same point in the pregnancy.
I saw that a girl's clitoris and labia can still be swollen and look like a penis at 15/16 weeks.
I believed it was a boy right away because I had a feeling and because of my crappy sway...
Ugh. My anatomy scan isn't until Jan 6th...
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awe lissa. I think alot of us go through the denial phase. i really and truly did. Granted mine was even worse because i had genetic testing that said girl that i was in denial about. thinking maybe they just missed the Y by some chance. I would still prepare to hear boy. I dont know about the clinic you went to for your ultrasound but normally they wont guess or they keep looking until they are sure...Some boys dont really have a 'bulbous' ball sack at 16 weeks from what ive seen...obvious penis not always obvious balls..and this boy may be very obvious at 20 weeks where he wasnt at 16... If you had any pictures from the scan we could guess on them though while you wait and pass the time
I definitely went through this I spent hours on the Internet trying to establish if the harmony test has ever been wrong, I found little to indicate that. I kept thinking maybe they have mixed my results up with someone else. I think it is all part of the process, I do think that people predicting gender from u/ s can get it wrong, I was told ds1 was a girl at 20 weeks and two of my friends were told the wrong gender, one was told girl and then at 36 weeks boy, he is still in a pink nursery because she could be bothered to re paint! The other found out at birth, she was told boy but had a girl. This pregnancy am glad I know it's a boy as I have had a few scans now and have saw nothing to indicate he is a boy, so if I did not know, I would be really thinking I had got my girl! xQuote:
Originally Posted by Lissastick
It was an elective ultrasound. The baby wasn't cooperating AT ALL, and the woman did not get a pic of the thing I thought looked like a penis. I was just ready to accept it, but, my husband is also in denial. He's not bonding with this baby like he did with our first son. I am pretty sure he's got GD and he's in the denial stage still thinking the U/S was wrong. I have been telling him it couldn't be wrong, but now I'm wondering.Quote:
Originally Posted by Burakoam
I'm already used to the idea of another boy, so honestly, it would do my head in if they told me girl at 20 weeks. I wouldn't believe that either. Hahahah!
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Sometimes they do get it wrong and mistake part of the cord for a penis. With DS2s scan at 16wks I was very confident that he was a boy and did not have it checked again. I would still assume you are having a boy but get it confirmed at 20wks. It is normal not to believe the ultrasound either way as I still worry my two scans were wrong!
we will see lissa! i would hope she wouldnt have guessed if she wasnt sure but not all elective ultrasound techs are as awesome as the one i have seen for all 4 of my pregnancies...she actually will have you come back for another ultrasound for free unless she is 100% certain and baby shows 100% positively wether it is a boy or girl..mine have always been quite obvious fortunately or unfortunately lol not over until the lady sings at your 20 week scan...i would still prepare to hear boy again just in case.
Oh Lissa that really sux, you had the elective scan to find out gender and they didnt even give you an image?
My hubby is still in denial, ive had 4 scans now and told girl at each one, hubby hasnt come to any of them though so still thinks she may come out a he.
I said I'd swap you lol!!!Quote:
Originally Posted by Cinss
So hot here need to soak my feet in an ice bath. Starting to feel Bub move more and more now which is nice!!
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I had my midwife appointment today. Everything is ok except for low iron. My hemoglobin was good but the feritin was low, I only had that tested because I had a dizzy episode at work about 2 weeks ago.
Officially in the 3rd trimester this week!
How is everyone going getting prepared for their new arrivals? I still have to get the nursery painted and set up, although she will be sleeping in our room for at least 6 months but it is nice to have set up for clothes and probably day sleeps. I'm hoping my dad will be able to paint for us since DH won't have enough time off work.